Confessions of a PA student: Adios, Suckers!

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Adios, Suckers!

leaving for mexico tonight through texas. all tanned up and pedicured with new sandals and sundress, a 300 pack of Dramamine (my elixir of choice- i wonder if they have support groups for people like me) and ready to go. ate the last fresh food in my fridge and attempted to put my house in some semblance of order so that we will come back to what looks like a house that grown-ups live in. wonderful friend taking us to/fro airport with only promises of eternal devotion and tequila.

glad for the get away and the adventure, but also glad for a break from U.S news. hopefully i'll find that in a land of drug smuggling and kidnapping, our dire, dooms day economic prospects and our infernal insistence on "going green" (i've seen it on everything from cooking magazines- "re-use your oil" to women's magazines -what the HELL is "green sex"??? i don't even want to consider what can be recycled and reused) won't seem so exhausting and annoying. PLUS, i'll get to practicar mi español a bit.

and i had a great last day of work yesterday. did a total abdominal hysterectomy w/ an Ob/Gyn i did a rotation with last year and it was awesome! interesting case and i was very involved- she did 1/2 and i did the other. i was high all day from that. :)

i won't have 'puter access in mexico, but we'll be taking lots of pics and i'll post on it when i get back. assuming i don't get kidnapped, eaten, or drowned. if one of these fates befalls me, please eat some chocolate and take a shot (pudding shot?) for your fallen homie.

hasta luego!

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Amateur Movie Reviews

"A Christmas Carole"...the 2009 animated Jim Carrey film feels like it's true to the nature of the original Dickens' story. It is dark and scary and sad and shows the mid 1800's in London as a pretty hard place to live for anyone but the upper crust. The movie was surprising because it is not at all like the previews we saw for it before it came out which made it look like another bleak 3D action adventure nightmare remake. I mean, even the jacket cover of the DVD looks stupid and silly, but the film really isn't. It was actually really good. And the actors/voices! I mean, in addition to Jim Carrey (who plays a bunch of parts and is good in all of them), there is Gary Oldman, Colin Firth, Cary Elwes, Robin Wright, and Bob Hoskins. Well done indeed. Recommend emphatically. But don't show it to little kids- it is too dark and scary.
"Black Swan"...what an interesting, beautiful movie. Intense and doesn't let go of you from the first moment. Leaves you talking about it for much time afterward, which is the goal of thoughtful art house movies, is it not? Shows a fairly accurate (to my understanding) descent into schizophrenic paranoia in the world of professional ballet- a world already high strung and uber competitive and sort of castrated (girls encouraged to never physically develop into women, pampered and babied but also driven to breaking point) but also undeniably sexual. Natalie Portman is stunning and shocking and very well controlled. The rest of the actors around her are excellent. There is a much talked about sex scene between her and Mila Kunis, which works within the context of the movie. There is also a lot of violence- both self- mutilation and simulated violence toward others, so be warned. Some of it is hard to watch. But would recommend this movie, yes.
Freaky Bad Movies I've Seen Over the Last Few Months, A Comparative Study... For some reason, the BHE and I have landed on some truly woeful flicks recently. We've either been advised to watch them by weirdos we know or just sort of Netflix Instanted our ways to them. The first, "The Room," is apparently being appreciated as a cult classic a la "Rocky Horror Picture Show" and there are monthly showings of it in big cities. It is terrible. Melodramatic, bad acting, lame characters you're not invested in, story goes nowhere, and the lead guy who is the writer, director, and star closes his eyes when he speaks and sort of has to chew his way around his accent to get his words out. He also has the body of Skeletor and, unfortunately, is featured in some music video type sex scenes. But, we couldn't seem to turn it off. NOT that I am recommending it. Just letting you know it exists and that there are entire communities of people devoted to its watching. The second, "Bitch Slap" is basically soft porn. Bad acting and no pay off, but with a plot that is super violent and convoluted. It does have fairly good production value as if at some point it was supposed to be a real movie. It also features Lucy Lawless ("Xena") and Zoe Bell (a stunt woman, way more awesome in her role in "Grindhouse") and some of the actors have regular features on real TV shows...but nonetheless, it is merely an excuse to watch barely dressed girls beat on each other and blow things up. The last "film" we watched is called...oh, geez, I can't believe I'm admitting to you that we endured the whole darned thing..."Thankskilling." Sigh. It's a low, low, low budget film about a turkey cursed with this ancient white man/Native American voodoo conflict thing and it comes back to haunt people. The people it is currently haunting happen to be co-eds who like to drink beer and get naked. The turkey has all the funny lines and periodically you'll see things from his perspective- in "turkey vision." There are boobs and violent slayings, but you'll see way more of the latter. So those are quick summaries of these very bad movies. In comparing and contrasting them I'd say, they are similar in that none of them really needed to be made or watched and in contrasting them, I'd say for sheer weirdness, "The Room," for T & A, "Bitch Slap," and for turkey puns, "Thankskilling." Thank you for your time.
"Alice in Wonderland"...this year's Tim Burton live action/animation extravaganza...Johnny Depp as an exquisite and lively (and not such a creepster as his Willy Wonka) Mad Hatter, Helena Bonham Carter as the big-headed evil and delicious Red Queen, Crispin Glover as himself with long legs and an eye patch as her evil lover/side kick, Anne Hathaway as The White Queen, Alan Rickman as the voice of the Caterpillar, Michael Sheen (Wesley on "30 Rock") as the voice of the white rabbit, etc. I dragged my feet to see this film because i LOATHED AND HATED Tim Burton's "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" and was worried they'd pop-stylize and take all the fun out of this one, too. But happily, they did not! It was beautiful and clever and fun and totally mesmerizing. Story was great, characters and actors were fantastic. Really enjoyed it. And you should watch the "making of" extras- very interesting.
"Crazy Heart".. I couldn't help but compare this movie to "The Wrestler" the whole time. Aging former super star in his realm (this time country music instead of wrestling), womanizing against his better judgment despite a woman he loves but is forever letting down, and a child in his life he wants to connect with and can't . Similar in the gritty filming and excellent acting (starring Jeff Bridges, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Colin Farrell, Robert Duvall). Less of a downer ending than the other movie, but you have to suffer through some country music. Not bad country music- good old school country music, but still. And Colin Farrell is shockingly fun and genuine as an up and coming country music singer. Hard to recognize him in fact.
"Keeping Mum"...this British film from 2005 is dark, dark funny and grotesquely amusing. It stars Rowan Atkinson ("Mr. Bean") as a very restrained pastor...the straight-man, whose character actually has to be instructed in the art of comedy, he is sweet and still beguilingly witty and brilliant even outside his typical wheelhouse. It also stars Maggie Smith ("Professor McGonagall" Harry Potter) as sort of a demented Mary Poppins, Kristin Scott Thomas ("I've Loved You So Long," "Life As a House," etc) as a jaded pastor's wife, and Patrick Swayze, looking a little thin, but otherwise smoking hot and hilarious as the sleezeball trying to steal said pastor's wife (and daughter, and neighbors, and any other convenient female flesh). A few of the images are a little stark and creepy for a silly comedy, but I think that's my American movie sensibilities in conflict with British ones. I recommend it indeed. Perhaps I should put the tea on, yes? :)
"Abre los Ojos (Open Your Eyes)"...this is the original Spanish version of the later re-done in a crappified American way, "Vanilla Sky." I didn't hate that movie when I saw it in 2001, despite some of the actors involved, because the plot is so freaking cool. But the original, released in 1997, was SO much better! Partly because in "Abre los Ojos", you have actually good actors (Eduardo Noriega for Tom Cruise, Najwa Nimri for Cameron Diaz, Chete Lera for Kurt Russell, Fele Martínez for Jason Lee, and well, Penelope Cruz for...Penelope Cruz). Both scripts are written by Alejandro Amenabar (who also wrote "The Others"), but he directs the Spanish one while the American one is directed by Cameron Crowe ("Almost Famous", "Say Anything...", "Jerry Maguire"). The shots are gorgeous in the original. They don't stand out in the remake. The suspense, the thrill, the intrigue, the set, the costumes, makeup...all of it is just superb in "Abre los Ojos." I remember thinking the remake was OK, but not being floored like I am about this one. Ok, so you have to read subtitulos. No biggie. Totally worth it. I highly recommend this movie.
"From Paris, With Love"...John Travolta is the good/bad guy. He looks gayer than he does as Danny Zuko. Somehow. There's a lot of shouting and shooting. Dumb. Do not recommend.
"Hot Tub Time Machine"...we saw this 2 wks ago and I have been NEGLIGENT in not getting this review out to your sooner my dear reader(s?). This is one of the funniest movies I've seen in a long time. From the get-go we were laughing out loud. It's a total loony concept where these guys go back in time (per a malfunctioning hot tub) to their glory days in 1986 just when they're about to either actually or metaphorically kill themselves because their current lives suck so much. There's 80's clothes, music, and movie references aplenty. John Cusack has a starring role as well as wears a trench coat in some of it and represents 80's film (along with cameos by Chevy Chase and Crispin Glover). Clark Duke is a new fave of mine (great name plus OUTSTANDING in "Greek" on ABC Family). Rob Corddry ("The Daily Show") and Craig Robinson ("The Office") also good. Fun! Go see it!
"District 9"...was up for Best Pic and we just got around to watching it this weekend. It's filmed documentary-lite, but you follow around the main character. The premise is a spaceship with over a million 6' tall crustacean-looking aliens lands over Johannesburg in South Africa. The military breaks them out and puts them in internment camps (slums) where they stay for 20 yrs. Lots of unrest among the humans and aliens and alien-ism (they call them "prawns" and restrict them to certain areas, assume they're all mindless, violent and less-than humans, etc). One government guy who is supposed to get the aliens to move away from the city (NIMBY) to another camp ends up getting infected by some sort of alien fuel juice that starts his transformation into an alien...then there's bonding betwixt him and a father/son alien duo and enlightenment and there's more parallels to racism and genocide. All in all, a really intense, well done sci-fi thriller w/ some sociopolitical bend. Good stuff.
"Zombieland"...well, our rainy movie-watching weekend started out really strong with this one. Woody Harrelson (woohoo!!), Jesse Eisenberg (big brother, "Squid and the Whale"), Emma Stone ("House Bunny" and others), Abigail Breslin ("Little Miss Sunshine"), and Bill Murray (everything funny, ever). Even from the opening credits this movie was fast-paced, super funny, gory gross and clever. The use of titles across the screen (rules of how to survive living among the undead) were creatively incorporated in/around the scenes. We just loved it. Go get it and enjoy it. Apparently I'm way late to this parade, because everyone we've told about it already saw it/loved it.
"Inglourious Basterds"...well, I have to say that 3/5 of the people I watched this with fell asleep. And considering that it's a spy v spy Tarantino action flick, that's not so good. Only once or twice did it actually feel like a Tarantino movie. Randomly a scene was labeled or a character was identified with big disco letters across the screen. But there was no consistency to that. And some enjoyable scenes or characters were cut short while others were drawn out for no reason. There were maddening close-ups on things that I think were meant to be symbolic and significant, but were pretty blatant and lame....(MILK!! WE GET IT!! OK!!!) and he doesn't usually spoon-feed his audience. Just felt like bad editing and muddled direction. Cool concept and fun idea and some moments were delicious, but very few. Even the gratuitous silly violence of his films that I usually like just seemed sort of out of place with the rest of the movie. Like when Hitler was shot (or stabbed? I can't remember) and then burned alive. Necessary? No. Funny? Not even a little bit. But the actor that plays the bad Nazi (heh...maybe the really bad Nazi? should i distinguish?) Christoph Waltz was dynamite. Even if they gave him excessively long drawn-out scenes, he ate them up. He was really fun to watch and es good that he's been nominated for best supporting actor.
"Fantastic Mr. Fox"... stop motion animation like "Rudolph" with voices of George Clooney, Meryl Streep, Bill Murray, all the other usual Wes Anderson crowd, and other recognizable ones. Based on Roald Dahl book, directed by Wes Anderson. Well, I liked it. I guess. It's very Wes Anderson with the scrapbook type linear collage shots and the character's quirks. Fun and silly, and the animation was really fun to follow. Except I didn't like much how they ran. You'll see what I mean. I don't know. I guess, overall I felt rather neutral about it.
"Avatar"...big, beautifully and technically impressive. Go see it on 3D while it's still in the theaters. Worth the extra $$. Story line was a bit preachy and lame. Seemed kind of pro-environment over anything/anti-war/anti-American/white man both ruins and saves ancient tribe. Hmmm... kind of a blown up "Fern Gully." And it's basically beautiful and fun and easy for kids to enjoy- and kind of feels like the perfect fantasy/sci-fi made for middle school boys...but then there's real violence and big swear words and other stuff that just kind of muddies it. But it was pretty.
"Where the Wild Things Are"...what a freaking GREAT movie! Oh, what total fun. Do go see it. It is, of course, based on the children's book by Maurice Sendak which I love, love, loved as a kid. It's sweet and silly and just a really fun 'wild rumpus.' The movie (directed by Spike Jonze!) is all those things, but also poignantly illustrative of what it's like to be a kid. The complaints I heard about the movie were that it showed those uncomfortable, scary, sad, embarrassing moments of childhood and that a kid's movie shouldn't emphasize that. But I thought that's why it was so meaningful. We look back at childhood in this blissful haze, but in reality, it's hard work being a kid. Maybe the stressors in our life aren't as significant then, but we're so emotionally raw that everything is a big damned deal! Every little perceived rejection is a broken heart. Let-downs can shatter your universe. And, on the flipside, being sought after or befriended makes you feel like a king. The film is beautifully filmed, with awesome puppet costumes and amazing, grandios set design. Still, my favorite moments were the believable, quiet simple ones like young Max lying on the floor under his mom's desk while she works on the computer, fidgeting w/ the toe of her nylons, just to be close to her. Precious. Or those times when both the elated smiles and the tears are too quick to come. Just rings so true to what I remember about being a kid. And the kid actor who plays Max was perfect (conventienly, his name is Max Records). There are lots of famous voices as the wild things, but it almost didn't matter...it wasn't distracting like other kids movies (you know who you are, "Shark Tale"). Absolutely loved this movie- I smiled like a goof through most of it, even if it was through tears.
"Wristcutters: A Love Story"...cool movie. Sounds (and is, a little) dark and creepy, but mostly really creative and sweet. It's about people who committed suicide and are then banished to a gray, smile-less alternative universe where everything sucks just a little bit more than it did in life. But despite this, the young people at the center of this find hope and some fun as they roadtrip it across the low-class, dirty landscape that is their new land. Also, all fun actors sharing great chemistry. Funny and cool, for sure one to catch.
"Up"...Pixar (Disney) film this year that is definitely for children (see: talking dogs, hundreds of balloons lifting and moving house to South America, large version of the Froot Loop tucan, etc), but my word, the first 10 mins of it are some of the sweetest, most poignant scenes on marriage I've ever seen. The BHE and I both cried like titty babies during the montage. But totally worth it- sweet, smart, funny, clever and amazing animation.
"The Last King of Scotland"...Forest Whitaker won the best actor Oscar for his role as the man-child dictator Idi Amin whose inconsistency and tremendous ego made him an all the more horrifying leader who left Uganda with 300,000 slain under his 8 year reign in the '70's. James McAvoy plays a young Scottish doctor who goes to Africa for medical missions and finds himself glamourized by the large personality of Amin and romanced by the fame and idealism of being on the new president's staff. Things go terribly wrong, as evil empires are oft to do, and the rest you'll just have to see for yourself. There are some cringe-inducing moments, but just squeeze your eyes shut and get through them. Worth it for the acting, the scenery, the soundtrack.
"Burn after Reading"...Coen brothers movie out last year, starring George Clooney, Brad Pitt, John Malkovitch, Frances McDormand, Tilda Swinton and a very funny JK Simmons (again) among others. It was fun. Goofy, witty, dark, and all the while they're shaking their heads at their own tom-foolery. I liked it. I don't think the reviews were very good, but I would definitely recommend it. Brad Pitt's manic character energy is pretty funny, and certain specific habits he uses to establish the trashy but honest gym rat are right on.
"Made of Honor"....ok, so once again while cleaning my house I carried my mini laptop around with me and watched a terrible movie. It stars McDreamy Patrick Dempsey and a girl who looks like the wife's sister on that terrible show with the not funny Belushi brother..but isn't. They supposedly met in college, but even allowing for him being a senior and her a freshman- they have a notable 10 yr age difference. And I knew the movie would be bad, but it literally hit every single romcom stereotype. Montages? Check. Funny buddy scenes? Check. Overwrought soundtrack? Horses? Dramatically interrupting a marriage ceremony? Checks. And they totally copied "Three Men and a Little Lady" (an excellent sequal, actually...come on! Tom Selleck!) with the far off land groom castle deal. They also copied "My Best Friend's Wedding," "Spaceballs" and others. Totally bogus. And the witty team of writers (credits including the Flinstones AND Brady Bunch movie sequels...haven't seen them, but don't think Mr. Selleck was in them, so off to a bad start) should win some sort of award for the following lines: "There's someone I've been lying to for a long time...myself." and "Do you know that I've dreamed of my wedding shower since I was 10 yrs old?" I mean, seriously. AHAHAHAHAHAHA! You can't make this stuff up! (I have GOT to get back to my must see movie list! For reals!).
"The Lives of Others"...won best Foreign film Oscar in 2007. Written and directed by Florian Henchel von Donnersmarck (isn't that awesome?), it is a very interesting movie set in East Berlin in 1984, five years before the wall comes down. Socialists are doing their wicked things and preventing disloyalty or escape by spying on, among others, the writers, directors, actors and other artists. The story unfolds when, for very shady reasons, a local successful (and previously party loyal) playwright goes under suspicion. He is trailed by an especially ardent and idealistic believer in the system (played by an excellent Ulrich Mühe), The movie focuses on the beliefs and loyalties of this man as what he witnesses in his spy efforts forever change him. The oppressive government is another character in the movie. The acting was OK all around- although U. Muhe definitely stood out. Also, the film is in German and subtitled. I had to mention that last in case you're like me and tend to avoid anything that sounds like work. But this is an interesting movie that I will be thinking about for a long time to come and wish I was better able to articulate my thoughts on it. Would be a good one for a movie club to discuss. Alright- talk amongst yourselves.
"Duplicity"...yawn. A vanilla version of "Mr. and Mrs. Smith." Bleh. Julia Roberts is good, relaxed, fun in it. But otherwise I didn't think it deserved any of the good reviews it got. Jut lame and too confusing for the pay off. And talk about cheesy music. Every time any romantic dialogue came up, we were treated w/ overwrought, obvious violin music. Ack. These two were waaaaay more interesting together in "Closer."
"Munich"... a Steven Spielberg movie about the 1972 Oympics in Munich wheren Palestinian terrorists attacked the Israeli team. Ok, so this film is, objectively, awesome. And i am increasingly bitter as I process that it lost best picture in 2006 to (insert graphic and plentiful swear words here) "Crash"- which i loathed! I've been avoiding watching "Munich" because i thought it was really violent...but it was not that bad. And it was worth every occasional second of discomfort. Incredible cinematography- intriguing, interesting, psychological plot, And who knew Eric Bana could act?
"Quantum of Solace"...well, we finally got around to seeing the most recent Bond movie. Meh. Once again, using every type of vehicle (car, bike, boat, helicopter) in separate, never-ending chase scenes. Meh. (To their credit, I don't believe I ever saw them use a camel). And we still have the cantankerous Daniel Craig who, though uber hot and intense, just doesn't maintain any of the original whimsy and sophistication. He's a little rough around the ages for my taste in Bond. The lady in this film, Olga Kurlyenko, was pretty good even though I kept comparing her (favorably) the whole time to Thandie Newton (who sucked along side Tom Cruise in one of those Mission Impossible movies way back when). So all in all, meh.
"Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium"....delightful! The real reviews were pretty bad, but I was curious enough to rent it and we loved it! Natalie Portman and Dustin Hoffman are so sweet and whimsical. I totally bought it. And Jason Bateman and a young actor, Zach Mills, both were great additions. It was laugh-out-loud funny once in a while (when hiring an 'accountant,' Mr. Magorium says something like "he must be a combination of a counter and a mutant" and so they refer to J. Bateman's character the whole movie simply as "mutant." Cute stuff like that.) but mostly just really fun and sweet and fresh. The end was a little over the top and dragged out, but eh, we'll let it slide this time.
"Away We Go"...what a phenomenal movie! Wow! Closest to the kind of movie I'd want to make that I've seen all year. First of all- it's a win based on the actors- Maya Rudolph ("SNL"), John Krasinski ("The Office"), Catherine O'Hara, Jeff Daniels, Allison Janney, Jim Gaffigan, and Maggie Gyllenhaal...I mean, what a load! And it's such an interesting script about a couple in their first pregnancy trying to find a city in which to raise their child together. Sweet, funny, and in a few scenes (one notable one about miscarriage) incredibly, devastatingly poignant. I HIGHLY recommend it. We just saw it at the cheap theater a few weeks ago- so probably to DVD soon.
“He's Just Not That Into You”......this movie is going to be right up there for me with “Dr. Dolittle II” as THE BEST MOVIE EVER MADE. This is not because, they are, in fact, good movies. It is because they represent “home” to me now. I went to Cuba when I was in undergrad, and they played “DDII” on the plane on the way home and it was SO very cheesy and American and in English and all that, I just lapped it up. And since “HJNTIY” is the first flick I saw after returning home from an awful hospital stay, and I watched it all tangled up on the couch with my precious husband, I loved it. And, objectively, I think it was way better than I thought it would be. The acting was quite good all around. And the messages were positive overall.
"The Hangover"...has been described to me by a bunch of people as "the funniest movie ever." Which it is not. (Come on! Spaceballs? Blazing Saddles? Howard the Duck!?). But I laughed out loud often. It's sort of a higher-stakes version of "Dude, Where's My Car." With more dude parts showing and less hot giant alien robots.
"Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince"....I'm probably too biased on these films/books to objectively critique them (HP 4 EVA!!) but I will say that this one is lighter, happier, and funnier than the last few. New romances, new characters, and new character quirks all make for lots of fun. It's loooong (2 hrs 45mins) but doesn't feel that way. All the kids are growing up, which is fun. It's almost possible not to picture Daniel Radliffe nude after knowing that he starred in London's production of "Equus." Almost.
“The Wrestler”…Oscar Best Pic nominee, Best Actor Mickey Rourke. Filmed kinda like a documentary, it shows an aged and ragged, impoverished and physically wasted ex -pro wrestler who is now reduced to the low budget school gym wrestling league and signing autographs in rec centers for $8 a pop while wearing a fanny pack. Mickey Rourke, as said wrestler, is fantastic. And very emotive despite his apparent inability to use his facial muscles after much, much plastic surgery. Also, Marisa Tomei, age 44 mind you, is smokin’ hot and highly effective as an aging stripper. It’s a very sad but very believable story and is well executed. I recommend it.
“Murder by Death”…(1976)…wow. What total fun. Go out and rent this movie (or if you’re a Netflix junkie like me, watch it instantly online). Written by Neil Simon, the script is hilarious. It’s like “Clue” but even more sophisticated and actually funnier. Same stuck in a mansion everyone’s a suspect all a bunch of kooky characters feel. And it stars everybody. Truman Capote, Peter Falk, Maggie Smith, Elsa Lanchester, Peter Sellers, James Cromwell, and many others. It goes between slapstick and brilliantly subtle. I’m going to force everyone I know to watch this if they haven’t seen it yet, so you may as well give in and queue it up.
“The House Bunny”….too tired to bitch too much, but Anna Faris didn’t save this movie. Just lame and bad and all about how women have to be cute to get ahead, etc, etc. Supportive girl cast including Rumor Willis and Kat Dennings among others- all kind of meh. Some of them actively bad. Hugh Hefner and his concubines next door all make appearances. That’s all.
“Mama Mia”….what a very bright and shiny movie. Like a shampoo commercial. With bad singing. But, you know, it does involve Meryl Streep in overalls, so it is watchable. Barely. Being in a big pile of drunk girls post bachelorette party is certainly the way to watch it as it’s about silly girl friends and weddings….but still…not good.
“Sin City”...never got around to seeing this, but I relish Robert Rodriguez, so I suspected I'd like it. And it was fun. Zany and wild and cartoony and goofy and fun. Violent and cheezy and over the top and falling off the comic book pages fun. Could have been creepy in that a lot of the violence is children and sexual and eckyness, but because you find out early on that THE GOOD GUYS ALWAYS WIN you know you're not in for any unpleasant surprises. And the violence is the campy, punch a guy he flies across the room kind. Yellow blood splattering everywhere, etc. Plus, it stars everybody. Bruce Willis, Benicio Del Toro, Rosario Dawson, Elijah Wood, Mickey Rourke, Jessica Alba, Clive Owen= all good. And also Brittany Murphy and Alexis Bledel= not so good. Plus many others that you would recognize. I enjoyed it. You might to.
“Moonstruck”...my gosh, what a good movie. Just had to re-watch it while I cleaned the house preparing for a bachelorette party I'm throwing this weekend. I love everything about it. Even Nick Cage wheezing and mouth hanging open the whole time is fun. Good stuff. Watch it. “Playing it safe is just about the most dangerous thing a woman like you can do.” AWE-SOME.
“Milk”…Sean Penn won best actor for this historical based but fictionalized documentary-ish movie about Harvey Milk, the city councilman and area rep for the gay community in the 1970’s in San Francisco. He was a passionately devoted voice for the gay movement there and nationally. Through perseverance and a dynamic personality that drew believers in his cause, he made a major difference in a time of great turmoil in the movement…but at great personal expense. He was always in the glare of public scrutiny and was often threatened and facing violence, ultimately being murdered by a political peer/competitor. The elements of the story came together well. The acting was excellent- I totally forgot it was Sean Penn, he was so totally transformed. And even though he doesn’t get any top billing, I thought James Franco was awesome. (Why does he insist on doing movies like “Spiderman” and “Pineapple Express????“). Also, Diego Luna showed a lot of range as the clingy, childish lover (he’s been good in everything I’ve seen him in- “Y Tu Mama Tambien,“ small part in “Frida,“ even that awful “Dirty Dancing II: Havana Nights”--may you live for ever, el Swayze! Tooh, tooh, tooh.). I enjoyed it. Reminded me a bit of the feel of “The People Vs Larry Flynt” and “And the Band Played On.” I recommend it.
Double feature at the drive-in last weekend: “Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian” and “X Men Origins: Wolverine”…NATMBOTS was fun. I liked the first one kinda sorta a few years ago, but really liked this one more. It didn’t have to hassle with setting up the deadbeat dad/relationship with son and ex-wife stuff, but just jumped right into the talking historical figures. And Hank Azaria’s lisping pharaoh was awesome, as well as Amy Adams’ “Amelia Earhart.” She’s always bubbly and cute, but in this movie, she was really purposeful with it…and had a fairly good accent/owned the dialect. “Wolverine” was pretty meh. I’m kind of tired of the franchise and am afraid that now there will “origins” for all the characters. Yawn. I find Hugh Jackman fairly one-dimensional (even though, I know he has played both a ferocious mutant killing machine AND a “hello my baby, hello my darlin” song and dance man) and the other characters didn’t do much for me, either. The love interest was pretty good, and now I have totally seen her boobs while watching old episodes of HBO’s “True Blood” over the last few days. So that’s good.
“The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”…Oscar wins for Art Direction, Makeup, and Visual Effects, nominated for Best Picture, Best Actor for my boyfriend Brad Pitt, and many others. It was ok, but…slow. And kind of dull. They have old lady Cate Blanchett narrating in a monotone creaky voice, which didn’t help keep me awake. But it’s a fun plot idea- based on an F. Scott Fitzgerald short story- it’s about a baby born as a tiny old man who gradually ages younger until he ends up in his 80’s as an infant and then fades out of existence. The screenplay is written by Eric Roth, who also did “Forrest Gump” and that’s pretty obvious. Same whimsy, same ah, shucks-I’m-just-a-regular-guy-who-happens-to-be-involved-in-huge-moments-in-history thing. Even same broken girl meets sweet, simple guy. And you remember the repeating image of a feather floating through the air in FG? Well, this time it’s a humming bird. B. Pitt was pretty good in it. He has to do more than look smug and sexy, which is good. I haven’t seen “Babel” but he and C. Blanchett do have pretty good chemistry in this one. My favorite line is when he’s the tiny old man/boy and in a gravelly voice says “I’m 7, but I look a lot older.” The animation of the leads as really old/really young was only mildly distracting. It looked like “Polar Express.” So over all, cute movie. But it’s 166 minutes long! (that’s 2 hrs and 46 mins for you Canadians). Way too long for my attention span.
“Step Brothers”…Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly (“shake and bake” due from “Talladega Nights”) are both 40 year old man-boys who don’t really work and still live w/ their single parents….parents who hook up and get married and move in together with the fellas in tow…and then there’s fighting and swearing and licking of dog poo and being buried alive and all other sorts of shenanigans. Sigh. Just tired of the shtick, I guess. The last line in the movie was the only one I really laughed out loud to. But I can’t tell you that that’s worth 98 minutes of your time.
“There Will Be Blood”…ugggh. I’ve been dreading writing this review, but for my loyal fans (thanks, mom!) I will persist. Let me start by saying that I’ve decided that my taste is not so very sophisticated and that I prefer beer cheese to caviar when it comes to films. I had to ‘cleanse my palate’ after watching this by re-watching the venerable “Hot Shots! Part Deux” with Charlie Sheen and Lloyd Bridges. ‘Nuff said. This film was nominated for best picture (I of course as referring to TWBB, not the latter), best director, editing, screenplay, etc, etc and it won Daniel Day-Lewis the best actor award and won for cinematography. It was beautifully filmed-especially footage of burning, falling oil rigs at night. And DD-L’s acting is pretty remarkable. He’s mesmerizing. And I found his character really interesting. I heard a lot of people say he was “pure evil” and had only selfish intentions, but I didn’t see that at all. He was really complicated and the film didn’t spoon feed all of the source of his anguish to us, which I liked. And since the book it’s based on is Upton Sinclair‘s, the thesis is that ambition and industry are the devil…but, gratefully, again it wasn’t all black and white- there was a good blend of pain, angst, and drive in his character. He had an interesting relationship with his “son” and apparently intriguing relationships with his own dad and God Himself, where guilt and deliverance dictated his actions. It also wasn’t too simplistic about who was good and who was evil. There was a lot of conflict between the main character and the local pastor, but neither side was very likeable. Paul Dano (“Little Miss Sunshine”) was the weak link to me. They didn’t age him at all and I just didn’t like/buy his weasely preacher. And the end was just hokey and lame. There was screaming about a milkshake in a bowling alley (…brings all the boys to the yard). And then murder. (…it’s better than yours).
“Rachel Getting Married”…this is the movie for which Anne Hathaway was nominated for Best Actress for this year’s Oscars. She didn’t win, but she did do a good job of playing the addict in recovery in all its self-centered, unbalanced, gritty glory. The rest of the movie was pretentious and annoying. They focused WAY too long on scenes of musicians playing music and spent a lot of time congratulating themselves on their multi-cultural sophistication. Ahh, to have money on the East Coast. But I did like the hand-held camera work and I also liked Bill Irwin as the father . He was so fragile and sort of unpredictable. And I read on IMDB that he’s in the International Clown Hall of Fame…which is pretty damned cool.
“Be Kind Rewind”…Jack Black, Mos Def, Danny Glover, Mia Farrow, Sigourney Weaver. A movie about a struggling VHS video store in a New York borough . Jack Black tampers with a power plant for some abstract reason and then his magnetism erases all the tapes in the store…so to be able to provide the customers with the videos they want, Jack and Mos start making their own versions of all the movies- “Ghostbusters,” “Driving Miss Daisy, “ etc. And these 20 minute no budget (they call them “Sweded”) versions of the classics catch on (as things do in New York) and they basically save the store. It’s silly and feels very improvised and raw, like the movies they’re making. It was sweet and fun. I recommend it.
“You’re Never Too Young/Artists and Models”…Dean Martin, Jerry Lewis 1955. What fun! I had no idea Dean Martin was a slapstick comedian. He plays the straight man to Jerry Lewis’s goof, but they are together a hilarious pair. Who, naturally, break into song and dance once in a while. These are 2 movies provided on the same DVD, with “Artists and Models’ being especially enjoyable. It’s so silly and playful. For example, Jerry Lewis and SHIRLEY MACLAINE (in an adorable pixie cut) are smooching against a water cooler in one scene and the water in the cooler starts boiling. Cute things like that. And they wear awesome clothes. I think I was born in the wrong era. It’s just some good, wholesome, clever entertainment, by golly.
“Annie Hall”…(from the list). I get it. I understand now why Woody Allen is so revered and has had such staying power. What a fun, funny, delightful movie. I’ve seen a bunch of his other, more recent stuff and it’s too egotistical, not playful enough, to sardonic for me. But this movie is great. He’s so honest and realistic and ruthlessly self-deprecating but without taking too much obvious pleasure in his own destruction….like I see in his later work. He talks about his need for, maybe addiction to sex, but then also shows how such a drive would play out in real relationships…unlike other movies where he beds women like Scarlet Johansson with great ease. There’s less creepy factor in 1977, I guess. And Diane Keaton is really enchanting. I know this is the character she will play in every movie hence forth, but it’s good in its origins.
"Spider-Man 3"...spider shit.
“Twilight”….saw this at the cheap theater this afternoon. It was all dark and rainy here, so totally put me in the mood for it. So here’s my question- do you think it makes me warped that I found the lead character hot, hot, hot and he’s supposed to be a 17 years old undead-guy? Because, really he’s a 300 year old vampire played by the very pretty and legal 23 y/o Robert Patinnson (“Cedric Diggory” from Harry Potter). But man, they did a nice job making him irresistible and effervescent. And from the heroine’s perspective (the also excellent, apparently yummy smelling human Kristen Stewart), he’s the ultimate crush. So the movie was cool. I know nothing of the series, but hear that it’s quite the fad among those younger and hipper than myself. The film was beautiful- set in Washington, the whole thing has a cold, blue dreary wet feel to it. Thick atmosphere. The special effects weren’t too distracting and the looooong pauses between the leads as they try to figure each other out and not eat one another isn’t too painful, either. And I don’t think I’m alone in my infatuation with R. Patinnson in this film. I’ve heard other preverted old ladies like myself talking in hushed tones about how they’d give up more than their blood to him. HEY-OH!
“Slumdog Millionaire”…well, I failed at my mission to see all of the best picture nominees before the Academy Awards (which are tonight). So last night I frantically ran out to see the one I’ve heard the most buzz about. It’s a beautiful, sweeping, brightly colored, sweet and awful story about kids growing up in the Bombay/Mumbai slums facing every kind of horror. From violent deaths of parents, family, and friends to maiming for financial gain at the hands of “kindly” orphanage workers to being sold into sexual slavery, these kids have survived every flavor of human brutality. But the lessons they’ve learned have not only helped insure their survival, but for one “lucky” young man, they bring him mountains of money and fame on India‘s “Who Wants to Be A Millionaire.” The story unfolds as the man is being questioned (and tortured) by police to determine how he knew the correct answers to the questions in the game. Each flashback vignette shows the moment in his youth when he encountered that bit of knowledge. And the story also reveals the love of his life, the way his brother chooses power and money over truth as our hero does. It’s a very well told story. Beautifully filmed. There are funny and touching moments miraculously sprinkled in the desperation and grime (and actual excrement) in which the characters live. It’s a hopeful story, but it’s a long sad journey to get there. I would definitely recommend it. And understand why it’s surprising the critics and getting so much attention. I haven’t seen enough of the films to know which one deserves to win, but I wouldn’t be at all surprised if this one ended up on top.
“Zack and Miri Make a Porno”…(NOT from the list). It’s Kevin Smith’s most recent film, and it stars much of the Jud Apatow cast. So right away, you gotta be feeling pretty good about it. And it was OK. Some funny laugh-out-loud bits, some gross over the top humor (porn stars Traci Lords and Katie Morgan both give some…um…potty humor) and some silly love story stuff. I like Seth Rogen and Elizabeth Banks and think they have sweet chemistry, so that was fun. So I guess that it’s a luke warm movie that I’m happy to watch, you know?
“Blue Velvet”…1986 (from the list)…………….....…………WTF? I am so glad that this movie is over and I can check it off my list. I will never see this again or encourage anyone else to. I know it’s a cult classic for its commentary on the evil nature of people and the dark underbelly of what could be happening in the cozy suburbs…and it is, uh, something, the crazy stuff that writer/director David Lynch convinces some pretty darn good actors (Isabella Rossellini, Dennis Hopper) to do. But jeez. Too disturbing, not entertaining enough. Eck. It’s described in some places as a “dark comedy” where the innocent lead (Kyle MacLachlan- “Trey MacDougal” in SATC to all of us youngsters) is torn in a virgin/whore complex between “kinky” nightclub singer (I. Rossellini) and prudish high school student (Laura Dern). But there’s less kink and more kidnapped child and sexual abuse and exploitation and random ranting and…it’s ridiculous. “Dark” is not the word I would use. “Twisted” and “pointless” come to mind. And maybe the most offensive thing about it, when it’s coming to its conclusion at the end- it tries to become a love story!! WHAT? Roger Ebert’s review in 1986 is spot on. http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/19860919/REVIEWS/609190301/1023
"American Werewolf in London"...1981 (from the list). John Landis wrote and directed this movie....and he might be my comedic hero. He's principally involved (writer/director/producer/actor, etc) in "The Blues Brothers," "Three Amigos!", "Coming to America," "Animal House," "Twilight Zone: The Movie," "Clue," a few of the Muppet movies, and "Thriller"( best music video ever). I watched "AWIL" alone and actually laughed out loud- and I never do that. It's great from the first minute. It's campy and clever. The dialogue is hilarious. The music is so light and happy and contrasting with what's going on in the film- all the macabre slaughter that goes with werewolves doing what they do, and yet it's SO FREAKING FUNNY. My favorite parts involved awesome zoo footage and a little boy saying "a naked American man stole my balloons." Then later, when the were-man is sitting watching "See You Next Wednesday," the funniest porno ever in a sleazy all-night movie place with his undead friend in an advanced state of decay, who got killed by the same werewolf who bit the lead were-man and, then all of the were-man's undead victims show up and they all sit around contemplating the way the were-man should take his own life. They cheerfully list some 20-odd horrible deaths. It's so funny. And apparently there's historical relevance to the name "See You Next Wednesday," as it shows up in one form or other in all of John Landis' films. And to top it all off, they don't dwell on the monster itself. The first transformation man--> wolf is pretty techy cool, but then all the attacks are suspenseful and show just the face of the wolf. I like that (M. Night Shyamalan could learn a thing or two). And when they do finally show it, it looks like some angry Teddy Ruxpin doll. Also funny. And Frank Oz (Yoda, Kermit, etc) makes a cameo. So, in conclusion, totally go out and rent this movie. You won't regret it.
“The Reader”…Oscar nominee best picture, cinematography, direction, screenplay based on book, best actress Kate Winslet. I haven’t read this book (see last post), but I read, saw, and performed parts of the author David Hare’s play “Plenty” and it’s one of my all time favorites. He has quite a way of tapping into tragedy. This movie is no exception. Disturbing premises. Multiple of them. It’s set in the 50’s in Berlin, so there’s post-Holocaust war crime trials going on. And then there’s a 35 y/o Ms. Winslet making lots of sexy sex with a 15 year old (that’s right, 15!). But it’s a well written script and has some interesting cinematography…for me, there’s too many close-ups used on unnecessary things like vomit. But then there’s also a church that they use several times that really fills the screen and has its own character-it’s beautiful and very poignant (kind of like the green dress in “Atonement”). Ralph Fiennes and Kate Winslet are wonderful. She so embodies her character- heavy, stodgy German woman in this one…well, heavy-footed and severe/without makeup, but she’s very thin…we know this because we see her bare ass a lot. (With a 15 year old. Did I mention that?) I thought the young man actor (David Kross) should have been nominated, too. (thankfully he’s actually 18 years old….making it only marginally better as K. Winslet is actually 33). Anyway, it’s pretty and fascinating, allowing for lots of post-watching conversation. But I don’t think it will win best picture. The other awards, yea maybe.
“The Diving Bell and The Butterfly”…(from the list). From the book of the same name, it’s ‘written’ by the French editor of Elle magazine after he had a massive stroke leaving him in what’s known as “locked in syndrome” where he is totally alert and oriented and aware with all his mental function intact, but his body is almost totally paralyzed. He can only move his eyes to indicate. And indicate he does! After the initial terror and depression, with the help of his speech therapist and his baby mama he uses an alphabet communicated by blinking to spell out words to write a whole book. I read most of the book and it was so sad, I tapered off. But the movie is beautiful and fresh and sweet. It’s filmed so well, the actors are wonderful, the narration is enchanting. I highly recommend it. And if you’re like me and you watch the movie instead of read the book because you’re just that lazy….you'll be relieved to know that the movie is NOT subtitled. Though set in France and the characters speak with French accents, it is in English. Phew.
“Rumor Has It”…Jennifer Aniston, Kevin Costner, Shirley MacLaine, Mena Suvari in this take off on what would happen if ‘The Graduate’ plot were real and Elaine had a daughter and this daughter found out all about the sordid affair and chased down the “Benjamin Braddock”character later in life. Not too bad for a stupid romantic comedy. Parts of it are kinda creepy ( K. Costner and J. Aniston only have a 14 year age difference, but it‘s supposed to be more like 25 in the movie) but I like the homage to “The Graduate”- possibly introducing THAT excellent movie to this generation of middle school girls who like THIS kind of silly comedy. And S. MacLaine is at her raunchiest funniest most irreverent in this film. My hero.
"Eagle Vs Shark"...2007 indie film from New Zealand. Won a bunch of awards at Sundance and elsewhere. It was like a dumb, obvious, un-funny, trying-too-hard version of Napolean Dynamite. Eck. Don't bother. And PS- you can't dress up a hot girl like a nerd and say she's always been a nerd. Lame, lame, lame.
More Important Cinema….well, I’m working my way down the list of important movies I should have seen previously but never got around to it and I have to say, after this weekend’s allotment, I must conclude that I am much less sophisticated than I previously thought. If we were talking about appreciating fine wine instead of theater, I would have to say that I’m on the grape Koolaid end of the spectrum. We (the “royal we” being the BHE and me- he has dutifully agreed to go on this cinematic voyage with me) started the weekend with “2001: A Space Oddysey”….Stanley Kubrick, 1968. This is considered a profoundly important movie for its use of special effects and images, camera angles and shots, etc, etc. But I found it so dull I kept falling asleep. First, it’s 3 hrs long (with an intermission- kill me). The music was loud and invasive and often didn’t seem to match what was happening on screen. Like I’m waiting for a climax because the cymbals just crashed, but on screen there’s yet ANOTHER panoramic view of a satellite and nothing has changed. Very little dialogue but plenty of men in monkey suits being very symbolic. And I know I’m not appreciating that these accomplishments were a first and paved the way for all movies since 1968, but not my bag, baby. As far as the plot goes, apparently the characters go to the moon and Jupiter and there’s an evil robot (not as exciting as it sounds) and more loud classical music. Gag. BUT I AM NOT A TOTAL DIMWIT. The NY Times review from 1968 says at one point, “…it is somewhere between hypnotic and immensely boring.” I concur. The second movie we watched was “8 ½”…Federico Fellini, 1963. I’ve heard Fellini’s name tossed around as the inspiration for some of my favorite directors and I’ve always been curious-knowing that his work is a lot to bite off. This movie is self-reflective of its narrator (and I assume, its creator), full of dream sequences and flash backs, and art reflecting, mocking, and co-existing with life. It’s crazy. But I really enjoyed the ride. I won’t pretend that I understood all of what he’s saying with it. But I loved seeing the origins of ideas and images later found in Tarantino movies and others. It’s black and white and in Italian, but totally worth the effort. I will definitely see more Fellini (“La Dolce Vita” will be next) and probably read up on him so I have a little understanding. Once my brain has rested. I had to watch “Hot Shots” while making dinner to cleanse my pallet, so to speak.
“The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert” (1994)…this is the first of my “1001 Movies I Must Watch Before I Die” campaign (from the book of a similar title- 5th edition, Steven Jay Schneider, published by Barron’s). It was FABUlous. So much pretty costuming (won an Oscar for) and beautiful cinematography. Striking images of gorgeous plumes against a desert backdrop. And hilarious, raunchy, and wonderful drag queens and transvestites. Well written script and perfect execution of it with wonderful actors; the two most well known to me being Terence Stamp (serious and British, usually plays a bad guy like in “Superman II”) and Hugo Weaving (‘Agent Smith’ the baddest bad guy from “The Matrix” and ‘Elrond’ the Elf king from “Lord of the Rings”). I should have seen this film long ago and am glad I did now. Tons of fun. But also rather poignant here and there. Some really sweet relationships and exchanges among the characters. And I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop…some gay bashing that’s worrisome and potential violence…I kept fearing something awful would befall them or there would be revelations of troubled pasts and demons…but happily there’s no major damage done and no ghosts in their closets, just plenty of moxie and makeup. And the music is all decadent like the rest of it- plenty of Abba, Gloria Gaynor, Village People and more to enjoy. This film was surely inspiration to Meryl Streep when she played a drag queen version of herself in “Mama Mia.”
“Kabluey”…so sometimes, when you’re perusing the new movies at the video store and you see one full of pretty famous people that looks really good from the description on the back but you’ve never heard of it and you’re pretty sure it didn’t actually make it to theaters but instead went directly to video, it’s actually pretty good. Most of the time it’s total crap. For example, one of the previews before this movie was called “My Mom’s New Boyfriend” and involves Meg Ryan in a fat suit and the FBI and other casualties like Antonio Banderas and Selma Blair. There’s probably a reason you never heard of it and IMDB has it listed as released in April ’08. In Spain. (I do find it remarkable that it didn’t succeed when it includes “filial devotion” in its plot summary). ANYway….the movie I’m actually talking about, “Kabluey” is delightful. Lisa Kudrow is the biggest star, but it gets cred for having all kinds of folks in it- ‘Dennie’ from “Grey’s Anatomy,” ‘Berta’ from “Two and a Half Men,” Chris Parnell, Teri Garr, and Christine Taylor. It also stars (and is written and directed by) someone I hadn’t seen before but who’s really fun and sweet- Scott Prendergast. Anyway, so it’s about this sad family where the dad’s away serving in Iraq and has been for several years and the fed-up, scared, and lonely mom (L. Kudrow) is barely surviving when her lazy but lovable brother-in-law (S. Prendergast) comes to watch her crazy kids while she works. He ends up working for her failing company part time in a huge blue costume passing out fliers. This gives him anonymity, and in turn, many insights into what’s happening in the home and in the company, but also, in the end, a sort of super hero protector status for the family. It’s a quiet, neat, well shot movie. I really enjoyed it. And would recommend it. It’s a bit goofy, but in a dark, silly, but thoughtful kind of way. And maybe Lisa Kudrow should get more kudos than she gets. Maybe.
“Lars and the Real Girl”….rented it this weekend and really enjoyed it. I’ve actually been dragging my feet on watching this movie for some time. The premise is a bit bizarre (a man falls in love with a “love doll” and the whole town accepts the eccentricity/illness and helps him through it) and I thought it might be too sucrose-sweet and over the top. But instead, it was excellently written, subtle, beautiful, and really well acted. I think that Ryan Gosling is a force. He is so talented and varied in his performances. He plays this awkward, broken man with delicacy and confidence. He’s a joy to watch. And my praises are 99% awe at his skill with the craft and only 1% mad, mad love for him because he’s ‘Noah’ from “The Notebook” and I am, at heart, a 13 year old girl who wants her life to be a romantic comedy and him to be the hero in it. Sigh. Everyone else is great in it, too, especially (again), Patricia Clarkson. I would definitely recommend renting it. Oh, and even though it’s about a sex doll, there’s nothing indiscrete about it. It’s rated PG-13.
“Nick and Nora’s Infinite Playlist”…we saw this movie at the cheap theater this weekend and it was pretty good. It’s all about the music and the music was great. But I am evidently an old fuddy duddy …because I couldn’t quite get over that the movie was about high schoolers in New York who apparently have no curfews, no limits, and no parents. They stay out searching for shows and being drunk in train stations until 5:00am, stripping for each other, and being shocked and ashamed that the girls’ sexual encounters haven’t yet brought them to climax. Despite all my gripes, I found Michael Cera and Kat Dennings in the leads had good chemistry and were pretty cute. The other characters were kind of meh. Ari Graynor (a Tatum O’neal look-alike) was playing drunk the whole time and was pretty believable. Alexis Dziena plays the ‘perfect’ but evil ex girlfriend is a little creepy looking to me. She’s tiny and built like she’s in high school, but she has a very mature face that sort of doesn’t fit her body. She reminded me of that extremely off-putting character in the TV show “The Parkers” played by Countess Vaughn (http://images.zap2it.com/20030716/parkers_240_001.jpg) who was supposed to be in middle school and Monique’s daughter, but looks to be about 40 years old.
A Very Merry Movie Christmas….well, we didn’t actually go see any of the new movies that are out right now. Too busy sitting around with family eating and playing games (like “Quelf”…have you played it? It’s hilarious). But I did receive the following most excellent movies as gifts for Christmas- “Elf,” “A Christmas Story,” and “Forgetting Sarah Marshall.” I also received the 5th edition of a book called “1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die.” And I decided to take it as a personal challenge. I went through the list and checked off the ones I’ve seen for sure (about 100) and plan on methodically going through the rest of them. I think I might even renew my subscription to Netflix to make sure I can do this. My parents just happened to have “The Man Who Knew Too Much” lying around, so I started my quest with this one. Written in 1956 and directed by Alfred Hitchcock, it stars Doris Day and James Stewart as tourists who get caught up in a spy, assassination plot, kidnapping dealio. It was very suspenseful and the acting was swell all around. Doris Day sings “Que Sera, Sera” which was later used as the theme song to her television show “The Doris Day Show.” It got caught in my head and I was humming/singing/bellowing it all weekend. I would recommend this movie for the awesome outfits, great music, and general feel.
Let’s talk about the holiday movie selection this year. Because my family and I surely do enjoy a light and happy family Christmas movie at the local cinema on Christmas night. So here’s what we have to choose from this holiday season. Ready? 1) Tom Cruise as a pirate Nazi (“Valkyrie”). 2) Meryl Streep as nun and Phillip Seymour Hoffman as priest in a movie about pedophilia (“Doubt”). 3) Another James Bond movie, still (“Quantum of Solace.”). 4. Keanu Reeves…in anything (“The Day the Earth Stood Still”). And there are a few that I might actually consider- and I will get back to you on which one(s) I pick. They are as follows: 5. Reese Witherspoon and Vince Vaughn in a rom-com-fam-feel-good “Four Christmases,” 6. Another mouse adventure movie…after ‘Ratatouille’ I’m definitely ready to give it a shot (“The Tale of Despereaux”), 7. Jennifer Aniston/ Owen Wilson (yawn x 2), but really cute book (“Marley and Me”), 8. Eva Mendes is cool and it might not totally suck (“The Spirit”), 9. Automatic points for Cate Blanchett…and anyway, this one I am actually kind of intrigued by and so this is going to get my pre-election vote (“The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”), 10. Tired of Jim Carrey, sorry (“Yes Man”), 11. Sort of looks fun, too (“Bedtime Stories”), 12. Will Smith is delectable, but reviews have been horrible (“Seven Pounds”), 13. Cartoon dog, meh (“Bolt.”). So again, I’m a little non-plussed by what’s available…but maybe I’ll be pleasantly surprised. I will keep you posted.
“Married Life”….this is an interesting period (50’s) piece about the delicacies of marriage in the suburbs when adultery and murder aren’t entirely out of the question. It is filmed really well; good script; good overall sad but intriguing feel. Reminded me a bit of “The Ice Storm” but not quite as dark (no children involved). And the acting is marvelous. I usually think Pierce Bronson is a light weight, but I liked his pauses and presence in this. And Rachel McAdams, though a little young and blonde in this part, really holds her own with the big stars. I’ve found her charming and skilled in everything she’s done (“Mean Girls” she’s a hoot, and “The Notebook” she’s brilliant…but we can’t talk about that movie anymore or I will fall apart into pitiful sobs). And Chris Cooper is always thoughtful and good. But the real show-stealer is Patricia Clarkson. I’ve found that I like her in everything she does. She was absolutely profound in both “The Station Agent” and “Pieces of April” which both came out in 2003 (and are both worthy watches…especially the first…the second is also good- even though it does have Katie Holmes in it, don’t hold that against it).
“Family Stone”…holy shit, Diane Keaton. That’s all I have to say. Well, almost. So this is not the first time I’ve watched this film. And it’s not good. And I totally am not recommending it. But, there were a few very small things about it that I did like the first time around, so I tolerated it in the background as I cleaned the house this weekend. The family speaks in American Sign Language to a deaf son, which is pretty cool. And they don’t make a big deal out of it, they just do it. And Diane Keaton’s character is aging and ailing from breast cancer and they actually let her look old= show her without makeup. And they even briefly, and not very sentimentally, show the mastectomy scar. Which I think is really powerful. Now the reason I’m scolding Diane Keaton is that the rest of the script and movie is total crap. Most ridiculous love story ever. Sarah Jessica Parker, Luke Wilson, Claire Danes, Durmot Mulroney- lame, lame, lame, lame. They just threw it in and cashed their pay checks. But Diane Keaton actually put some effort into this and did a bang up job. IN SUCH A STUPID MOVIE! She’s been making a series of bad movies….and I haven’t even seen half of them. But I can say here and now that “Because I said So” and “Something’s Got to Give” are woeful. I’m seriously annoyed here. I should really write my senator about this. Addendum: Just to make it clear- I don’t think she’s some sort of acting savant or anything. But she is a pillar of film (“Godfather” series, “Looking for Mr. Goodbar,” “Annie Hall,” etc) and is making a crappy romantic comedy turn in an otherwise over all interesting career.
“Role Models”….I come out of my movie watching hiatus to this hilarious new movie. It was written by David Wain (writer from such greats as “Reno 911” and “Crankyankers”) and Paul Rudd (great apathy/angst in all of Jud Apatow’s movies, not to mention his famed role as “Josh,” Cher’s sometimes-brother, sometimes-boyfriend in “Clueless” many many moons ago). It’s a mildly funny premise about two coworkers in charge of publicity for an energy drink (that they affectionately describe as poison and resembling “Shrek’s piss”) who get themselves in trouble w/ the law and face jail time versus community service time in an organization similar to the Big Brothers of America organization. They take the community service time and Paul Rudd and Sean William Scott (“American Pie” franchise, “Dude, Where’s My Car?”) are the “bigs” and they are matched with two “littles” who are quite handfuls. One (Christopher Mintz-Plasse-19 y/o playing 16, but totally passable…known from “Super Bad” - is WAY better here than he was as “McLovin”) is a renaissance fair role-playing geek outcast with a self-absorbed mother and creepy step dad and the other is a foul-mouthed, all-attitude little punk from a loving single-mother home, played by the comically brilliant 12 year old (actually and as written, 12 years old) Bobb’e J. Thompson. Needless to say, the movie turns out funny and sweet, lessons are learned, kids and grown kids find love and self-awareness, and there are lines from the script that will be quoted by my (stoner) friends for the rest of history. I cannot repeat any of them here. Decorum will not allow it. Lastly, let me not forget the wonderful Jane Lynth (all of Christopher Guest’s movies, amazingly funny and uncomfortable in “40 Y/O Virgin”) as a former coke-head, now reformed philanthropist heading the big bro organization. So forgive me for so much time passing since my last movie review. Instead of watching movies and reporting back to you, I’ve been, you know, saving lives and stuff. :)
“The Onion Movie”…for anyone not familiar with the satirical newspaper that is “The Onion,” you really should do yourself a favor and check it out online (http://www.theonion.com/content/index). And then they made a movie. And I rented it this week. It’s very ‘Monty Python’ with one skit leading into another and going from big humor to silly to potty humor to plot and back again. It also does the ‘breaking down the 4th wall’ thing and actually comments on itself during the movie (more Mel Brooks, maybe). I would definitely recommend it. Lots of random cameos- including Steven Seagal and Michael Bolton, as well as a number of comedians, of course. Funny stuff. It’s kind of dreary weather lately, so this was just right for picking us up and making us laugh.
"High School Musical III"....no, just kidding. But we did just rent "Smart People" with Sarah Jessica Parker, Dennis Quaid, and Ellen Page. He's a cantakerous professor of literature who lost his wife and is raising his two kids on his own...EP's character filling in as wife/mother and smarmy tirant. SJP plays an ER doc who is about as clueless and lifeless as they come. Either she's only good as Carrie Bradshaw (and then, she's TOATALLY BAD ASS!) or she gets written into terrible parts. Anyway, snobby boy meets lonely girl and sparks kind of die before they start. It was not a fun movie and the characters decisions made no sense. The only really cool thing in it was Thomas Hayden Church in a moustache as DQ's brother. He gave a little life to the movie. But otherwise, bleh. And the previews/reviews made it sound so interesting.....drag.
“Bedazzled”… (the 1967 one, NOT the 2000 one). Look for the bikini clad babe on the front cover that is Raquel Welch, not Elizabeth Hurley. This one stars Dudley Moore and Peter Cook and it’s a sweet story about a bah-humbug shy fry cook (Moore) who sells his soul to the devil (Cook) to get a girl, and ends up learning a lot about himself, about deals with the devil, and even about God's nature. It's funny, creative, and endearing...and maybe I'm easy, but I found it sort of faith inspiring, too. I strongly recommend it. It is rather British, but don’t hold that against it. It’s Mahvelous.
“Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull”….saw this at the cheap theater this weekend. It was great. Really true to the original series’ blend of goofy action, nerdy over-the-top dialogue, and fun, but not distracting, special effects. Harrison Ford in all his oldness (now age 66), didn’t seem like he was trying to reclaim glory days or anything. In the plot, this movie was set many years after the last one (during the Cold War, scary Russians everywhere) and he made mention a few times to being “too old for this sort of thing.” He runs into an old flame (Karen Allen- “Raiders of the Lost Ark,” “Animal House”) and they rekindle their sparring love and find that they together spawned an angry greaser Shia LaBeouf….who in about 3 beats gets over the fact that his father abandoned him his whole life and gladly joins his dad’s cause. Fortunately, he has the inherited traits of being able to swing from vines with monkeys, sword fight while straddling a speeding automobile, and survive unscathed when a car lands directly on him and then skids past. Impressive. But most fun of all was Cate Blanchett as the Russian colonel psychic doctor villain. She was all Rocky and Bullwinkle funny. Amazing cheek bones in chopped, face framing black hair, evil and calculating. So hilarious. A perfect bad guy. And because this is Indiana Jones and not Bond, their good guy/bad guy relationship isn’t compromised by him knocking da commie boots with her. Which I appreciate. So if you haven’t seen it yet, I would recommend it. Lots of fun.
“Bottle Shock”…it was fun to see this movie about the revolution of the American wine industry while we were in Napa Valley. And Alan Rickman is a genius and had some of the movie’s very few funny lines (like when Bill Pullman’s character questioned why he just really didn’t like AR’s character, he said, “Because you think I'm an ass. And I'm not really. It's just that I'm British and you're not.”). Overall, the movie was really forced. They tried to affect a hippy freedom thing but my geez, the costume people used THE WORST wigs I’ve ever seen. And there was an intern who was kind of annoying and was lying with all the ranch hands in the biblical sense….and it just was overall poorly paced, edited, and executed. So don’t bother….unless you just want to see it for the pretty footage of wine country.
“Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay”…is a sequel to their original (Harold and Kumar Go to White castle). We watched the unedited version, and if you want a little less gratuitous grossness, go with the edited one….but this was funny. Goofy, unbelievable, but funny. Both actors have gotten funnier since their last time together, so their subtle reactions and comic timing is right on. This one, again, is a little more over the top than the last, and has some actually disturbing moments in it for no good reason (prison rape, abuse of prostitutes, murder), but it’s funny and does include footage from Amsterdam, which is awesome and kind of the characters’ Mecca.
“Dan In Real Life”…you know how long john donuts are usually way too much crusty pastry and not enough cream filling? Soooooo not the case w/ this awful movie. I bet 2/3rd of the movie was filler (at 98 minutes, that’s roughly 70 minutes of creamy badness). It was about a super lame over-the-top giant extended family who, to show their charisma and spunk, do “togethery” things like competitive crossword puzzles and freaking talent shows complete w/ costumes and lights. This family (headed by Dianne Wiest as kind of a bitchy matriarch and John Mahoney as a skinnier and bad acting version of the dad he played on Frasier) is totally unbelievable and rather annoying. The movie is also about “Dan,” the sad bastard widow (Steve Carell- good actor, but BAD SCRIPT) and his three pissy daughters, and a boring woman (Juliette Binoche) who brothers (SC and Dane Cook) fight over. This movie was offensively bad. I can’t even write in complete sentences about it anymore. And what’s worse- my little sister, the one whose favorite movie is “Bring It On” said this movie was pointless and boring, and I, regretfully, have to agree with her on this one. Geez.
“Definitely, Maybe…” as my spouse is away this weekend, I felt obligated to rent chick flicks and drink wine in my underwear. So I picked up this one, which I’ve been meaning to see. Abigail Breslin (the total star in “Little Miss Sunshine”) is a favorite, and I’ve liked Ryan Renolds in everything but that awful “Waiting” disaster. And the three leading ladies are all quite good, also. So this movie is a tear-jerky love story thing w/ a kid and a divorce. I can’t really get past the whole divorce part to be excited about him finally getting ‘the one who got away’ seeing that there’s a child suffering through this divorce and all….but overall the movie is cute. Perfect for crying alone in my underwear and eating chocolate chips out of the bag.
“Heroes”….I watched this oldie (1977) on hulu.com where I’ve been mooching many free movies and tv shows lately. I had never heard of it, but read a description and review since it was on the list of free films they offer. I might be the last person on the planet to realize how incredibly talented Mr. Henry Winkler is. In my transom he’s pretty much Fonzie and the short funny coach in The Waterboy, but apparently he’s won a bunch of Emmy’s and Golden Globes and is known widely to be an excellent actor. And he’s amazing in this movie. It’s about a Vietnam vet who, despite and because of his mental illness related to the war is chasing an impossible dream across the country…with the help of excellent, very young (early 30’s at the time) Sally Fields and Harrison Ford. It’s not a preachy Vietnam movie. It’s sweet and funny and poignant and sad. And HW is so good. So subtle and specific, graceful and just wide open. Very believable in showing his vulnerability and hope.
“Pineapple Express”…the best thing about this movie is the name. The worst thing about it is that the name implies it might be an interesting, fun movie. Or a movie of some kind. It is in fact, merely a series of stupid one liners and smoke rings, watching while a character lights a joint or while that character points and laughs while another character lights a joint. It’s pretty apparent that this “script” was “written” by a bunch of stoned guys whose storyboarding went something like , “dude…you know what might be funny?” or “dude, you know what could be awesome?” or “dude…dude…I can’t remember what I was going to say…dude…” We went to this FREE sneak preview (doesn’t open nation wide until August 8) and left before it was halfway through. It was that bad. And bear in mind that we own and enjoy films like “Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle,” “Dude, Where’s My Car?” and even “Reefer Madness” for God’s sake! And yet we could not tolerate this movie. To be fair, we would probably not have gone to see it in the first place if I’d done any research before hand- the fact that “Pineapple Express” is a type of weed is revealed on the web site. And that the tag line is freaking “Put this in your pipe and smoke it.” Good geez. Seriously-Apatow Productions= breaking my little heart.
Badadadadadadadadada- BATMAN!- “The Dark Knight”…wow. So first of all, don’t take your little children to this movie-it’s a pretty tall PG-13- for violence and “menace.” No doubt. Even from the first few minutes, there are ruthless killings in the name of the Joker’s anarchy. It’s just so, so dark. It offers some commentary on the good/bad in normal people and there’s plea for hope on the subject, but mostly it’s just a wildly action-packed, twisted and fun movie. I happen to think Batman is the most Badass of all super heroes, so I’ve seen almost everything made in connection with the character. In comparing it to the other Batman reincarnations, this and the last (“Batman Begins”) both directed by Chris Nolan, reflect the “Batman: The Animated Series” feel more than the mid-90’s pappy crap movies (“Batman Forever” and “Batman and Robin”) from which many of this generation were introduced to the Batman franchise. And it goes ever more into real-moviedom than the acclaimed “Batman” and “Batman Returns” from Tim Burton in the early 1990’s. These last two go deep into the hero’s psyche and his struggle as man/visionary/vigilante and they are both well-rounded, well-acted, well-shot films. They definitely stand out on their own from the recent flood of “super hero” films as they are simply extremely well done. This movie, for example, utilizes the talents of the following incredible actors: Morgan Freeman, Michael Cane, Gary Oldman, Christian Bale, Maggie Gyllenhall, Aaron Eckhart, and Heath Ledger. Much is being said about Heath Ledger’s performance (and of course, his recent death)- and it’s no surprise that he steals the show in this movie. His performance was the reason I mostly liked “Brokeback Mountain” –it was both insistent and subtle as he completely encompassed the character and projected that cowboy’s pain and depth. And also in this movie, he is completely absorbed into the part of the Joker. And it’s a complicated, alarming, and totally unique presentation he gives. When he’s on screen, you can’t stop staring at him- every move he makes, every grimace and sideways, playful smile is purposeful and also CRAZY. When he’s not on screen, you kind of crave him, or feel his presence lurking. It’s cool. This part is written to be like no other villain on screen I can think of, and Heath Ledger disappeared in it and brought it to so much manic, fascinating life. Other than that, this movie introduces Two Face in an awesome way and should win an Oscar for best makeup and possibly best cinematography and editing. Gary Oldman is so reliable and so good. Everyone is. My only disappointment is that I heard an interview w/ M. Gyllenhaal where she said she wanted this superhero girlfriend part to be more than just another pretty girl sidekick. And, unfortunately, there wasn’t much more to her. The character was dating her boss (SO NOT OK). And most of her dialogue was about “yes I love you, no I’m not sure, I’m confused” blah, blah, blah. And…this is not her fault…she has such an interesting look/way of carrying herself, that I found her own huge smile a little bit too reminiscent of the Joker’s. But those are small complaints for what overall was a great performance in a fantastic movie. Go see it.
"Hancock"...I'm not going to say much about this, because it's fun and cool and Will Smith is a fine actor (ie: delicious- I want to take him home and molest him)....you should go see it. I recommend it. It has a surprise about mid-way through that's been ruined by many the major critics, so don't read any reviews before you go. I think there are sociopolitical angles to this too- something about the big bad black man in LA and such....but... flying is cool! And Will Smith is a fine, fine actor.
Double Feature at the drive-in….”Kung Fu Panda”… adorable! And fun! And well written and well animated. And funny. There were lots of animated fighting scenes, but the best was a sweet training scene where the panda and his master are ‘fighting’ over Chinese dumplings. Yum. And there are many scenes w/ Chinese noodles- (we were craving spicy noodles so badly that we tried to find a place at 2:00am when we left the second show to find some….had to settle for falafel). I love Jack Black and he was exceptional in this movie. And I liked the message- that we’re all heroes if we recognize it, and that fretting about what we can’t do will prevent us from doing it…the turtle master quotes what is maybe a Tauist phrase? “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present.” I like that. And maybe this is in part because the first show didn’t start until it was dark at nearly 10pm and so I was tired, but the second movie, “Iron Man” did not keep my interest. I like Robert Downey Jr. very much and there were cool parts to the movie, but it was way more political/war machine movie than it was super hero movie. And I get so bored of the inevitable climactic scene in action movies where the two big monsters have to fight each other. Just spare us. We know the bad guy is going to end up falling off or through some building when all is said and done, just be quick about it.
"1408".... so this horror movie w/ John Cusack and Samuel L. Jackson looked kind of cool in previews. And I can't remember for sure, but I don't think the critics hated it. But I have to say, this movie was notably bad. It's kind of a scary premise about a cynical ghost hunter who finds an actually evil hotel room where 50 some odd people had killed/maimed themselves in it. But the scary things that happen in the room are SO DUMB. Not only does it flood and earthquake and freeze in there and the walls ‘bleed’ grape Kool-Aid-looking stuff, but then we also have to deal w/ sentimental crap about the guy’s relationship w/ his estranged wife, his grief over his daughter’s recent cancer death and some beef with his dad. There are psychological elements that could have been explored further- why is he listening to hell and damnation preaching on the radio when he says he’s an atheist? Why did he stop writing actually good books and go for thriller haunted hotel guides? Why would John Cusack and SLJ decide to be part of this movie after reading the script? And just when I had let John Cusack off the hook for “Serendipity.” Can we expect more of this and “Snakes on a Plane” from SLJ? And why can’t Stephen King just leave well enough alone? He insists on too big, over the top, obvious shots and never leaves anything to the imagination. Dumb, dumb, dumb.
"Forgetting Sarah Marshall"...alright, I know I've already reviewed this movie, but I took my husband to see it today (he hadn't yet) and I LOVED IT AGAIN and MAYBE EVEN MORE. You gotta go see it if you haven't already. And it really makes me want to visit Hawaii.
“Baby Mama”…so as usual, when my husband goes away for the weekend and leaves me home alone, I go into 100% total self-indulgency mode (unlike the rest of the time when it’s more like 70%). When I left the clinic, I went to my favorite snobby bohemian food store where they glare at you if you use a grocery bag instead of bringing your own reusable cloth one with a smarmy saying on the side…and I bought the sushi combo large enough to feed, say, 15 people, and came home and ate it all on the floor while watching bad TV. Then I went to see the movie, which in time I will actually get around to reviewing- you have to WAIT for it- and then I went to the mall and wandered around trying on expensive perfumes that I’ll never actually buy….and then went to TJ Max where I poured meticulously over all the overstock gourmet food, cooking, and home decorating items I also did not actually buy. (I was, however, MORTIFIED to find out that all this time I’ve been cooking without Tahitian Vanilla Bean Rum Extract or Provencal Lavender Pepper Salt Blend and came THIS close to purchasing a must-have set of stained glass looking dessert plates for only $25!! I would have been ripping THEM off!). Anyway…so “Baby Mama” was really sweet and funny. It’s so obvious how much Tina Fey and Amy Poehler adore each other. They have excellent chemistry. Very smoothly trading off straight/funny man roles (although, clearly AP has the edge on goofy in this film). It was fun. Well written and fun. Steve Martin is awesome in a smallish part with an old man pony tail and who knew that Greg Kineer and Sigourney Weaver were in it? GK is excellent, as always but am I missing something? Is SW a little bland without an extraterrestrial sharing the screen? Anyway, I recommend it. And I appreciate that it’s on the topic of infertility and on ticking biological clocks but not from the perspective of annoying women hounding haggard men. Alright. Enough business. For tonight, I plan to drink the cheap wine I bought from said snobby hippy grocer and hunker down to more bad TV while periodically sniffing various spots on my arms where Gucci, Ralph Lauren, and Armani have all laid their scents. (Seriously, I smell like a money casserole). I have a major exam next Friday, so the rest of my weekend is devoted to academic pursuits. And possibly more sushi.
Whiskey-tango-foxtrot?...this has been a strange weekend in cinema. I consider myself fairly informed on cult classics, but I just got schooled in cult classics from the 1980’s. I have a bit of a sinus infection and have been trying various pills and potions to cure it, but I’m told that I was in fact lucid when witnessing these films and that yes, they really ARE this strange. In my recovery on the couch, Movies-on-Demand brought me both "Cry-Baby" and “Better off Dead” this weekend. “Cry-Baby” is the John Waters, Johnny Dep crazy thing from 1990.... singing and dancing and fighting and Tracy Lords, Iggy Pop, Ricki Lake, and something called “Hatchet Face,” a female who’s supposed to be in high school but is terrifying and clearly actually closing in on retirement. Just complete bedlam. And “Better off Dead” is a John Cusack (is he in every movie ever made? Well, he or Christopher Walken) flick from 1985. It seems to follow the whole nerdy boy being kicked around, teen angst looking for love theme…but then transitions into talking clay cheeseburgers and multiple suicide attempts, dreams and flashbacks/forwards….and in there somewhere they’re skiing for some reason. Completely trippy. So I need to watch a nice quiet John Candy movie to cleanse myself of these…I haven’t seen “Nothing but Trouble” in a while, maybe I’ll check that out….. :)
“Evil Dead II: Dead by Dawn”….unbelievably, I had actually never seen this classic Bruce Campbell/Sam Raimi movie until this weekend. All I knew what that it’s a low budget cult classic and that Jack Black says in “High Fidelity” about the movie, “It's a brilliant film! It's so funny and violent and the soundtrack kicks f’ing ass.” It’s fun. Goofy and funny and supremely gory. Tongue in cheek but still sort of spooky. I’m sure I’m the last person on the planet to see it, but in case you’ve also been living under a rock, go check it out.
"Sex and the City: The Movie"....woe to all you naysayers...it was Fab.U.Lous. But I’m pretty fond of the series, so I’m biased with no ability to critique it objectively. All the real critics are panning it. But I loved it. It was an estrogenapalooza at the theater. I’ve never seen so many drunken women standing in line for anything. Some wearing boas and all gussied up. It was fun/funny. I was as excited as any of them, but I did take a moment’s pause when I realized I was among the intended audience that the terrible previews were for. First of all, “Mama Mia” is being made into film. I have mixed feelings on it- I mean, it’s ABBA, but it stars Meryl Streep. So we’ll see. But this is the clincher- there is a Nicholas Sparks romantic comedy coming out (“Nights in Rodanthe”) where Diane Lane (yeck) is in an unhappy marriage and her crabby spouse and two kids leave for a weekend and Richard Gere comes and stays at her bed and breakfast. Well, she beds and breakfasts him all over the house and on the beach and then must decide if she wants her marriage or her ‘Bridges of Madison County’ lover. And they’re only together 1 weekend, but there are scenes in the preview of them telling each other “you saved me” and “you were born to be mine” and other unbelievably syrupy pap. And then NOT EVEN KIDDING there is a scene of wild horses running down the beach with them. WHAT??? Handsome stranger? Check. Sexy cooking scenes? Check. Beach opportunities for swimsuit ogling? Check. Fireside cuddles? Check. Freaking wild horses? And check. It sounds like a must-see for all us witless romantic women who want to hide from our own relationships in the surreality of crappy film. Even in my chardonnay haze, that preview made me want to stand up with fist raised and turn to the theater of 300 women and warn them that they’re being preyed on by movie execs. But I sat still because I didn’t want to miss a moment of Carrie Bradshaw’s tutu’d glory. I guess it’s all relative, huh?
“Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid”…released in 1982, written and directed by Carl Reiner, starring Steve Martin (then, age 37), it tells a story of a gumshoe detective and a kidnapping conspiracy. It’s filmed in black and white because they cut in scenes from old black and white movies so that it appears that Steve Martin and the few other real-time actors are in conversation and action with the old time movie players. It features Cary Grant, Humphrey Bogart, Ingrid Bergman, Alan Ladd, Ava Gardner, Burt Lancester, Bette Davis, and others. It’s really funny, creative, clever. The transitions between the old scenes and the new movie are pretty seamless. I couldn’t believe I’d never heard of this movie- but am glad I happened upon it now. If you haven’t seen it, I would encourage you to. It’s pretty family-friendly, but there’s some innocent sex and maybe some swearing in it. Favorite Line: Steve Martin, after being dumped, says---- All dames are alike: they reach down your throat and they can grab your heart, pull it out and they throw it on the floor, step on it with their high heels, spit on it, shove it in the oven and cook the **** out of it. Then they slice it into little pieces, slam it on a hunk of toast, and serve it to you and then expect you to say, "Thanks, honey, it was delicious."
“Forgetting Sarah Marshall”…..yaaaaay! I loved an Apatow Productions movie again!! Tra-la. I was beginning to worry, but then this little love story complete with great characters, actors, writing, editing, male nudity, and puppets, comes along and I’m back on the band wagon! It was really funny and sweet. Jason Segal wrote the screenplay and is also the lead (‘ballsy’ move to write in a scene where you the male lead has to show frontal nudity….sooooo naked)…but he is absolutely dynamite. A really good actor w/ excellent physicality, comic timing, and charming wit. Mila Kunis (Jackie, “That 70’s Show”) has really grown into herself- she’s got a smart, cool presence and is even prettier than she used to be. Kristen Bell, Russell Brand and Paul Rudd were all really fun, too. I highly recommend it. I watched it with my little sister in the theater, and I think I embarrassed her with how loudly I laughed through it. (But come on, with lines like, “I like her red hair. I wonder if the carpet matches her pubes.”). Go see it and tell me what you think.
“Drunks”….I watched this movie in a chemical dependency class at the VA this week. The members of the class were multi-substance abusers, many who had been to an AA class in the past. This movie resonated with them, most definitely, but I also found it really compelling. It was made in 1995 and is based on an off-Broadway play (“Blackout”) and reads somewhat like a play with lots of monologues, but also is a good movie on its own. It has lots of big stars in it, but they’re young and not very famous in 1995 (Richard Lewis, Sam Rockwell, Parker Posey, Dianne Wiest, Calista Flockhart) in addition to Faye Dunaway. It’s a great glimpse into the lives of addicts and their struggle to continue to stay sober “one day at a time” and their loyal attachment to each other based on the commonality and the belief in strength in numbers. There is one moment of near-sex, but it’s part of a sad downward spiral, so not hot. I would recommend this movie, especially to anyone who has dealt with an addict in their life.
“Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story”…I found this kind of disappointing. Not sure why. It had all the elements of success- it’s a spoof of “Walk the Line,” written by Jud Apatow (who I like a lot) and starring John C. Reiley (who I love) and with one hell of an ensemble cast. It has funny music in it (lines like, “Let’s duet. In ways that make us feel good. Let’s duet.”) and all the actors do their jobs…but still, meh. It has a zillion of cameos in it, including all of Apatow’s usual crowd and many SNL folks, but also Lyle Lovett, a bunch of the original Temptations, Jewel, Jackson Browne, Jack White, Jack Black, Jason Shwartman, among others. It was kind of silly fun, but you have to be in the mood for it, I guess. And it really made me want a monkey. Bugger.
“Avenue Montaigne/ Faueteuils d’orchestre”…..WARNING: THIS REVIEW IS ONLY TO BE READ BY ART HOUSE MOVIE SNOBS. This is a lovely foreign film, with English subtitles (I know, drag), set in Paris in modern day. It shows the interwoven stories of a few characters- one, a young girl new to the city and very naïve, a Bipolar soap opera star, a disenfranchised concert pianist, an old man selling his art collection and considering his mortality, and a movie director (the only American- Sydney Pollack). The acting and filming were great and the stories were really neat. I especially liked the pianist as he struggled to express his desire to leave the aristocratic classical music crowd and spread his craft among the common people. It also shows Paris beautifully and makes you want to be there. And there’s a cool café that all the actions center around that has a cool business model about catering to their famous clientele and making them feel normal and not gawked at. I wonder if there are places like that in LA. Anyway- go rent this movie if you like French people, Paris, piano music, art, or cute girls in pixie cuts.
“Semi-Pro”….saw at cheap theater this weekend. Holy funny, Batman- you have to see this movie. It was heelarious. And really well written, acted, just super all around (the editing WAS kind of splicey toward the end, but eh, we’ll let it slide this time). It’s another one of Will Ferrell’s genius comedies centering on his title character (eg- “Ron Burgundy,” “Ricky Bobby,” “Elf,” “Blades of Glory,”). Like those others, it will have many lines quoted among friends over beers- my favorites to date are “Let’s not talk about porking of the moms and sisters,” and referring to another guy’s wife’s large breasteses, “She just seems structurally unsound to me,” and “Can you punch me in the jejunum?” Too funny. And Will Ferrell is such a likeable guy- and he can act- (see “Stranger Than Fiction”- no really, go see it if you haven’t) and he seems like such a humble, ‘well golly’ type of celebrity. This is part sports-movie and part gaudy glam 70’s appreciation. It stars, alongside Will Ferrell, a marvelous Woody Harrelson, a smart and sexy Andre 3000 from Outkast, Will Arnett, Andy Richter, and others. Go rent it. Fo’ rizzle. Or you’re a total jive turkey.
"Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street"...rented this weekend. Very enjoyable. It's a musical that I'm not familiar with, so I'm not sure how the script/score has been changed from the original. The singing (done by the actual actors- Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter, Alan Richman, Sasha Baron Cohen and more) was fair. But the story is pretty interesting (how did they come up with a musical about a serial killer barber?) and the color scheme, camera shots, and detailed gory death shots were very Tim Burton. As my friend pointed out, even the fruit at the fruit stand was a dreary blue/gray color. All shadows and shades of gray. And then when there’s a dream sequence on the beach with blue skies- the vibrant colors are eerily stark and artificial feeling like a circus. Pretty neat.
“We Own the Night”….rented this also this weekend. And I have to say, you gotta go get this movie. It was so much fun, so well done, so intense and enjoyable. It’s a cops and mafia, disco drug movie with great romance and family drama and excellent acting. I just don’t have much to say about it because I was so absorbed in the story telling I wasn’t critiquing much. It was great. Go get it and tell me what you think. Oh, it stars Joaquin Phoenix, Mark Wahlberg, Eva Mendes, Robert Duvall and lots of cool Russians.
“No Reservations”…rented this romantic comedy this weekend. Have been wanting to see it for a while since I heard that it wasn’t horrible and I really like Abigail Breslin (the little girl from “Little Miss Sunshine”) and Cathererine Zeta-Jones. It was pretty good. It follows the typical formula- stuffy workaholic finds her heart when her sister dies tragically and leaves her w/ her spunky kid. Insert love interest who also helps her learn to trust and wins the heart of the child…almost gets away due to our heroine’s pride and need for plot intrigue, but then everything works out in the end. Lots of montages. Especially kitchen, cooking montages. But it weighed more heavily into the loss of the sister/mom than most movies like this. And they did a great job of not shining up/glamorizing CZJ too much. In fact, I’m pretty sure she was makeup-free for much of the movie. That was refreshing. She was less of a starlet prop and more of an actress. I forgot occasionally that it was her. She did well for the character. And my girl Abigail was tremendous. She’s a force at 11 years old. Aaron Eckhart is ok. More pretty than anything, but likeable. And it’s a good food movie….but not as good as “Ratatouille,” “Chocolat,” or “Tortilla Soup” for making you starve for what they’re cooking, or wish you were a chef yourself. I recommend it. It made me cry- but I’m sick, so a few minutes ago the Mercedes-Benz commercial also made me cry (it…was…just…so…beautiful…).
“Goldfinger”….to my great regret I am only now getting around to watching this 1964 007 Sean Connery era masterpiece. Wow. Sexy and funny and juicy and cool. The music and sound effects are over the top awesome and even the opening/closing credits are stylish and whimsical. Sean Connery as 007 is, naturally, very smooth, sophisticated, and alluring, but he’s also joyful and silly. And it’s funny how times have changed regarding sex in these movies. Recent 007 movies still show him as a super stud, but usually the movie only has one dame he’s conquering. In this one, I think I counted 5 women folk he bedded during the course of the 2 or 3 days in which the story unraveled. I just kept hoping he was using: Condoms. Latex Condoms. (get it?) The fight scenes and the sets were awesome, too. Maybe I’m a child of the 80’s (I mean, I am. But maybe it shows), but special effects haven’t added a lot to movie making, in my opinion. In the old days, if a movie was going to be creative and cool, it found super cool spy ways of doing it…without too much computerized hocus pocus. If you haven’t seen this movie- go out and get it. You will be more awesome just for having watched it. And if you’re saying to yourself, “self, we don’t own a vhs player doohickey anymore…whatever will we do?” Don’t fret- we rented it in DVD and the picture, sound, everything was pristine. And awesome.
“Death at a Funeral”….rented it this weekend. Directed by Frank Oz (Yoda, Fozzie Bear, Animal, Blues Brothers, etc). It’s a British comedy about a funeral and drugs and family dynamics and hidden homosexuality and general stodginess. It was alright. I think I just don’t altogether understand British humor. It’s just a little bit too dry for me, maybe. But at the same time always seems to include some bum and poo jokes. This was no exception. We heard this was a “laugh out loud” movie and at best I chortled. Peter Dinklage (best known to me from “The Station Agent”—a way better movie) was great. He always is. Everyone else was fine...I guess. I don’t know- I hardly saw them raise an eyebrow- in the very tight and controlled fashion of English comedies. I take it back- Alan Tudyk is also extremely funny (the pirate in “Dodgeball”- also a better movie), and it’s his cute white bum you get to see. But I wouldn’t recommend renting it just for those merits.
“No Country for Old Men”…saw this best picture nominee today at our local art theater. I think going to this stylish, edgy, intellectual movie house gives all movies we see there a bit of an advantage… but this movie didn’t need much. It was wonderful. Very simple, eloquent story telling. It jumped right into it and showed us what to expect and then left us alone, not spoon-feeding details but rather allowing the audience to draw our own conclusions and feel just as mired in the murky happenings as the characters. The film quality was gritty and the perspective, like the desert it was set in, brown and drab, dry and wide open so as to leave the subjects visible and vulnerable. The acting was excellent. Javier Bardem, the villain, is nominated for best supporting actor and Tommy Lee Jones is nominated for best actor. Josh Brolin was the other lead and I have to say, I’ve never had a thing for cowboys with mustaches, but I might start now. Just such a quiet, real performance. (And, you know, smoking hot). I have to say the weak point was his wife, played by the very British and stodgy Kelly Macdonald. I couldn’t figure out all movie why her southern/texas/hick accent stood out so much more than everyone else’s or why she drove me as crazy as she did- I think now it was because she was totally miscast and that she was superimposing a bad American southern white trash accent onto her English accent. And she had the worst line in the movie- from the previews- “What’s in the satchel?” Who talks like that? I know it’s West Texas and in the 80’s, but honestly? Anyway….there were many grisly murders and some victims were sweet innocents who had nothing to do with the money or the crimes or the game…but the movie had the grace not to show much of it on screen, just to make us aware. So it didn’t turn my stomach as much as it could have. And the movie was good enough to endure the bloodshed. I’ve heard people talk about how confusing the end of the movie is. I won’t give it away (hint: it involves Nancy Reagan and a purple unicorn), but to me it just demonstrated that the writer was more intrigued by the characters, the people involved in the drama, than in solving any mysteries or wrapping up lose plot ends. I was fine with it. I recommend the movie. Most def. And I’m kind of guessing that it will win best picture- even though I’ve yet to see (boo) “Michael Clayton” or “There Will be Blood.”
Violence in Movies- so as much as this might come as a shock, I’ve never really seen the “Indiana Jones” movies. I’ve seen bits and pieces here and there, but never watched them all the way through. So this weekend we rented all 3 of them. The “Last Crusade” was a broken DVD, so I only got to see the first half of it and will have to rent it again, but I made some observations about the others. First of all- Harrison Ford is a pillar of film and can just retire to go be in a museum or something. In his career he’s been both Han Solo and Indiana Jones and has made some 50 other films (of varying quality- see “The Fugitive” and “What Lies Beneath.”). And at age 65 he’s still going strong- with a new Indiana Jones movie coming out this year (my spies at imdb.com tell me) and a fiancé some 20 years his junior (Calista Flockhart). Aaaaaaanyway…..so the first 2 Indiana Jones movies were very different. And their main difference illustrated to me my comfort with violence on film. The first movie is all about grown up bad guys greedy for treasure trying to kill each other. The fights are almost comical stage fights and when blood is spilled, it’s from a bad guy who had it coming. That’s cool. I can dig that. The second movie involves an evil society of fanatical sadists torturing kids and making each other drink blood. Not so cool. To me a silly adventure movie with a goofy romance and a nerdy professor as the hero should not show children being whipped or bludgeoned or give speculation that the heroine is off being raped by the bad guys. That’s too real, too violent, and too sick for a lightweight film. And I think the victims of the violence and how the violence is demonstrated is what makes me ok with/hate certain films. Torture is never OK with me. Innocent people who can’t fight back getting beaten up, never OK with me. But cartoony violence where everyone knows the rules OK with me. This is why I’m always half OK with Quentin Tarantino’s movies. Most of the time it’s over the top, cartoony violence (much of “Kill Bill” and “Grindhouse”) but sometimes it’s rape and abuse (“Kill Bill” and “Pulp Fiction”). I watch them because I love them, but they often sicken me, too.
“Atonement”…another best picture nominee. It’s a WWII era English drama/tragedy about love, sex, injustice, class warfare and death. The scenes on the war were really well done. It showed things often not shown in war movies- the indirect deaths from unmanaged wounds and distant bombs, the soldiers’ boredom and frustration, the disorganization and chaos, the uncertainty, etc. The scenery and sets were beautiful. The acting was excellent- the male lead (James McAvoy- not nominated for an Oscar, but won all kinds of British awards) was intense and awesome. The only actor nominated for an Academy Award was the little girl that causes all the problems in the movie (Saoirse Ronan), but it was also nominated for music, cinematography, art, costume, and script. I didn’t love it. I certainly wouldn’t watch it again. It was artsy for art-sake…which I hate. It lingered on boring shots for way too long, ham-fistedly showing the audience what we were meant to be thinking (and in doing so, doubling the movie’s running time- note it was NOT nominated for editing). And it was kind of a pain following it around over time- it had all kinds of flashbacks, flash-forwards, (“and even a few flash-sideways”- to quote a great movie, “Funny Farm”). It also felt like 2 movies in one. It had this beautiful English estate Jane Austin-like romance and scandal part, and then it had the war. The tone of the movie entirely changed about ½ way through (but not in a good way like “From Dusk ‘Til Dawn”). It was just too haphazard and self-conscious/pretentious for me. It should win for cinematography and stuff, but not so much for best picture.
“Juno”….my first “best picture” flick on the list. Saw tonight and loved it. In case you’re unfamiliar, this is a ‘dark comedy’ about a 16 y/o weird, fierce, independent girl facing a pregnancy (and then adoption) w/ her best friends and family. I don’t know if this movie will win the award (it was also nominated for best screenplay and direction and the star, Ellen Page was nominated for best actress), but as of today, this movie is categorically in my top ten list of favorite movies. It was so good. In so many ways. It was the kind of movie I would make if I were clever enough to make movies. The characters were so well-developed and the actors so firmly seated in their parts that the lines were delivered so naturally it felt like improv. Jennifer Garner was delightful- a very thoughtful performance. And I want to be Allison Janney when I grow up. And J.K Simmons- brilliant. The dialogue was shocking, clever, and not self-conscious, but smart and playful, honest and simple. The scenery/set, too, was so natural, so un-affected, that it seemed like a real place that you could go back to for a visit. And the music kicked ass. From beginning to end, it was unusual, creative, and very complete. It reminded me of a few movies (that I also like)- “Napoleon Dynamite, (but more topical, less silly for silly- sake)” “High Fidelity, (but first life crisis instead of mid-life crisis, and a more appealing title character)” and “Little Miss Sunshine (but more plausible and less nudge-nudge-wink-wink).” I can’t say enough how much you should go and see this movie.
“But in mainstream movies the woman's role is mostly just to prove that the leading man is heterosexual…" a quote from Jennifer Jason Leigh ( who is, in my opinion, one of the most interesting actresses on stage or screen- she was enchanting/amazing in the stage production of "Proof" on Broadway a few years ago). And she makes a great point- very often the heroine is an “insert female character here” type role. Maybe give her a career, perhaps some smarmy one-liners, but no real personality other than to be sidekick to the male lead. I found that quote interesting, thought I’d share it with you (it’s from imdb.com).
"3:10 to Yuma"...on a recommendation from a friend, we rented this old west flick this weekend. It has Christian Bale (awesome in "Batman Begins" and skinny like Starvin' Marvin in “The Machinist”) and Russell Crowe (my favorite as a dad in “Mystery Alaska”) and Peter Fonda, and Luke Perry in a small part, and the list goes on. A rather enjoyable, well made western. Apparently a re-make of a movie of the same name, but maybe w/ more scenery and violence and less psychology than the original, per the NY Times reviewer’s comments. It was fun. I liked it. But it ended rather badly. It got all hallmark-y and predictable toward the end w/ a conclusion that was sappy and contrary to the character’s entire persona and world view. But whatever, it was still a good time.
"Idiocracy"...rented it this weekend. It's about how dumbed down our society might terrifyingly become if we let it. It's a farce on how an average Joe time traveler of today might be the brains of 500 years from now if we continue on the bad grammar/celeb crazy/pottie mouthed journey we have started. It was kind of cool. A little bit of reminder of all we have to lose. I would recommend it, just for a few laughs. And Maya Rudolph is adorable as a sassy hooker.
"American Gangster"....saw it at cheap theater yesterday. It's the Denzel Washington/Russell Crowe American mafia movie. It's being lauded for Academy Award honors. It pissed me off. Put me right in a bad mood. First, it's almost 3 hrs long. Can you warn a girl about this? I would have brought a crossward puzzle book or something. Second, for being a true story w/ lots to say, it sure wasted a lot of time and my interest on the style of the era and showing the extravagent wealth and stuff. And for all that- it was still pretty drab and dark. The only really good parts were when Denzel and Russell were squaring off against each other. They had chemistry and were fun to watch. But that doesn't happen until the last 30 mins of the movie. Denzel is in his 50's and uber fine. And is pretty good in this- although my husband says you can watch him act, it's not all that natural. And I can buy that.
"National Treasure II"...or whatever it's actually called. It was fine. Did its job, made me half laugh and half have to guess what was coming next. Hellen Mirren is a HOT 60-something jumping over bridges and sliming up walls in a tank top. She's great. Otherwise the most interesting thing about the movie was the portrayal of the president. He was kind of James Bond cool. With great hair.
"Charlie Wilson's War"....saw it over break. It's the mega Julia Roberts/Tom Hanks/Phylip Seymour Hoffman flick. It was alright. Way more political and way less entertaing than the previews appeared. PSH is amazing, as always. He should be in every movie ever made. And Julia Roberts makes a great Julia Roberts' drag queen impersonator. And you get to see Tom Hanks' ass crack. All in all, meh.
"Waiting"...is about what it's like to be a server in a restaurant. I picked it up because I was a server in many stages of my life and thought it might be funny and insightful. It was awful. Crude and not funny. And it takes a lot for me to say something is too crude to watch, but this was. The actors should be embarrassed to have their names attached to it. Luis Guzman, what were you thinking? He is pretty funny, though, despite the movie.
"Coversations with Other Women"...is an interesting film. It's filmed w/ a split screen showing Helena Bonham Carter and Aaron Eckhart encountering each other after many years apart. The split screen effect is neat- it shows the other's reaction to dialogue even as it's being said. And there are some flash backs to their younger selves (that are pretty lame, since they don't look like them much and seem really shallow and Peter Pan-ish and not real) throughout the dialogue. The whole thing is kind of neat, but reads like a play. And Aaron Eckhart can't keep up w/ HBC's acting.
"Madagascar"... not the best of the new, cartoony adult/children funny films, but pretty cute. I hate to say this, but I thought David Schwimmer's giraffe ("Melman") was the funniest. It was fun and worth seeing.
"Hot Fuzz"...is a British cop comedy that goes from goofy to dark back to goofy. And does it well. It was quirky and bizarre, with excellent characters and their actors portraying them. I really liked it. The critics agreed. There was something really enjoyable about watching them make fun of the action movie genre, while also kicking some English country side arse. I recommend it. Some campy bloodiness, but all in good fun.
"Enchanted"...am I just too cynical? Am I unable to enjoy the simple pleasures of song and dance and tongue-in-cheek merriment? The critics loved this movie but I thought it was not tongue-in-cheek enough, not sarcastic enough but also not sweet and cutesy Disney enough. It was kind of in the vast wasteland between. It brought to our attention how stupid the Disney romance formula of meet-marry-live happily ever after is, and attempted to push that formula into modern day real world and reveal its impossibilities, but then used that recipe to end the movie. I will now spoil some of the most sickly sweet plot points for you: the modern day divorce lawyer prince charming who has been desserted by his wife and left w/ his adorable daughter decides to leave his perfectly good girlfriend (who he's about to propose to) of 5 yrs for the movie's clueless, jobless, joyful cartoony princess. I guess the lesson is, pure, simple, silly uncomplicated love really is the way toward happiness. THEN, just to really go over the top, the jilted girflriend, who really doesn't seem all that upset that a crazy woman from nowhere stole her man, happily follows the cartoon Prince Edward, who she just met 5 minutes ago, home to be wed immediately to him. But to get there, she has to follow him down a New York City sewer grate. As my cousin said, "you have to be a really desperate woman to jump into the sewer for a man." Fine point. Ah, well. Little girls will love this movie.They will all learn the important lesson that if you want to win a prince, you have to dress pretty, sing often, and flatter the hell out of him w/ your big blue eyes...because clearly wearing practical pumps and having a successful career doesn't have the same flair. Good lessons learned. Amy Adams was pretty cute as the princess. Patrick Dempsey was way less annoying than I thought he'd be.
"The Darjeeling Limited"...the newest of Wes Anderson's films. It was fantastic. I wasn't a huge fan of "Steve Zissou" (Life Aquatic) but this totally made up for it and I think it equalled or even surpassed "The Royal Tenenbaums." Adrian Brody is pure joyness to see on screen. Angelica Houston is so fierce- she is the epitomy of sexy tough with chopped up short gray hair. The writing was funny and interesting, the cinematography was breathtaking, and the acting all around was superb. The thing I liked most was how it showed the role of the big sibling..since I am the oldest myself, I related to the way that big sibs are most often obnoxious and bossy, but also will do anything to protect their younger siblings and act often as a 3rd parent, whether they want to or not. I highly recommend it. My husband thought the characters weren't likeable and it took him a while to get into them, but I bought them from the get-go.
"Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix"...was totally awesome. Saw it tonight at the cheap theater. It was better action, better editing and a more complete movie on its own than any of the previous ones. There was less redundant dialogue and more getting to the point. And I love the more grown up versions of the kids.
"Pirates of the Carribean: At World's End"....hmmmm....saw at cheap theater last night....I would say, that as Hotty Mc Hotenstein as Johnny Dep is and as much as I've liked the other 2 movies, this one was lacking. It was too busy, too confusing for no reason. The motivations of the characters were hard to believe and to follow. And it stretched on FOREVER. Only the last 30 minutes or so were actually interesting. And jokes were used again and again, as if the writers were hoping we all were drinking the rum the pirates were and would forget we'd already (sort of) laughed at that bit 5 minutes ago. But Johnny Dep is pretty. Did I already say that?
"Super Bad"....is appropriately titled. Which disappointed me since I love the "The 40y/o Virgin" crew and want only the best for those oddball kids. But it was more crass with less pay-off (and substantially less funny over all) than their other projects and the leads couldn't really carry that much dialogue. Seth Rogen and friends wrote it in high school and that's a lot what it felt like.
"Reno 911: Miami!"..... rented it this weekend and low and behold, it was REALLY funny. The real critics' reviews had been pretty bad, and the show is pretty hit or miss, so my expectations were low...but I really liked it. Especially the "Noises Off" moment of campy set gags.
"District 9"...was up for Best Pic and we just got around to watching it this weekend. It's filmed documentary-lite, but you follow around the main character. The premise is a spaceship with over a million 6' tall crustacean-looking aliens lands over Johannesburg in South Africa. The military breaks them out and puts them in internment camps (slums) where they stay for 20 yrs. Lots of unrest among the humans and aliens and alien-ism (they call them "prawns" and restrict them to certain areas, assume they're all mindless, violent and less-than humans, etc). One government guy who is supposed to get the aliens to move away from the city (NIMBY) to another camp ends up getting infected by some sort of alien fuel juice that starts his transformation into an alien...then there's bonding betwixt him and a father/son alien duo and enlightenment and there's more parallels to racism and genocide. All in all, a really intense, well done sci-fi thriller w/ some sociopolitical bend. Good stuff.
"Zombieland"...well, our rainy movie-watching weekend started out really strong with this one. Woody Harrelson (woohoo!!), Jesse Eisenberg (big brother, "Squid and the Whale"), Emma Stone ("House Bunny" and others), Abigail Breslin ("Little Miss Sunshine"), and Bill Murray (everything funny, ever). Even from the opening credits this movie was fast-paced, super funny, gory gross and clever. The use of titles across the screen (rules of how to survive living among the undead) were creatively incorporated in/around the scenes. We just loved it. Go get it and enjoy it. Apparently I'm way late to this parade, because everyone we've told about it already saw it/loved it.