Thank God February is Almost Dead, Paczki's, and Undies

alright. seriously. longest (well, longest shortest) month of the year. snowy. still. cold. still. dark. still. boring. still. when, oh when will you end?

and to top it all off, i'm still doing this stupid diet thing (down 9.5 lbs total, but no change from last week so i'm bitter) AND i'm giving up chocolate for lent starting wednesday AND it's mardi gras tomorrow and all i want is a *&#%* paczki!!! but the stalin-esque spies on my weight loss team watch me like a hawk, so even if someone brings paczki's to work tomorrow, i can't have any unless i first kill the other 4 members of my team.

i could do that.

i did have a rather funny thing happen today. it's in a sort of warped context, so try to bear with me. i was doing a surgery this morning and things got a bit bloody. not a problem, patient was fine, no emergencies at all, just a bit...oozy. so oozy, in fact, that it oozed through my gown, through my scrubs, and right INTO MY UNDERWEAR. so after the case, i'm in my skivvies in the locker room faced with the dilemma- do i wear underwear soaked with someone else's life juice or do i permit flimsy scrubs to be the only thing standing between my most holies and the rest of the world? i took the commando option but later mentioned my conundrum to a coworker and she very wisely suggested i get a pair of mesh panties, usually reserved for patients post delivery or post-op who need roomy, comfortable, light weight diapers, basically.

and i have to say, they were very comfortable. i might never go back.

february is "responsible pet owner month"

Happy VD!!

Salty.

just finished a four hour case wheren i stuffed wads of toilet paper up each nostril and STILL had cascades of snot running down my face into my mouth behind my mask. the (hot) ortho surgeon looked up to make eye contact w/ me at one point and totally paused. i'm pretty sure he could see the slick wet snot soaking through my mask. sexy AND hygenic. :)

still feeling kinda crummy, but i'll survive. wasn't called in this week when i was on overnight call. just thought i'd give you an update since i promised i would. i like getting a few bucks an hour to sleep. pretty awesome. and tonight wasn't too bad, working the afternoon shift. it was nice to scrub in again. i'd missed it. back on all normal shifts next week.

by the way...did anyone see "30 rock" last week? i dvr'd it and have watched it twice, i thought it was so funny. tina fey is a hero of mine. for reals.

Bastard Patients Gave Me the Consumption

seriously. violent hacking cough. headache. subjective fever (meaning i'm making it up to make myself feel more legit). lazy, slow head. generally achy and groggy.

but my week on the floor is over. i'm taking one of my coworker's afternoon shift's tomorrow, so i'll be back in the OR and he'll be on the floor for me. which is a relief. it's different/stressful doing medicine. and i've missed surgery. and spending actual quality time with actual sick patients has made me sick. argh.

Hurts. Hurts So Much.

both my brain and my butt muscles hurt. mostly unrelated.

brain hurts because i'm on 'the floor' this week. meaning that i'm not scheduled to scrub any cases. but instead i'm following all the patients of about 8 doctors. which isn't as bad as it sounds- only had about 10 on my list today. but i'm making ACTUAL MEDICAL DECISIONS for them about fluids and antibiotics and pain control and what home meds they can safely take and when they're ready for discharge and dressing changes, etc, etc. plus i'm dictating discharge summaries (scariest thing ever- think seeing a typed transcription of the most idiotic answering machine message you've ever left then multiply that by medical terminology and pagers going off and interrupting your flow and trying to paw through a 10 inch high chart as well as find stuff on the new computer system all while supposedly forming and communicating complete thoughts on a patient's hospital stay into a phone. the first time i did it i asked someone "will they transcribe all my "uh....ummm's...." fortunately, they do not). and i'm on call tonight and have already gotten 3 pages. but not to come in for surgery...but rather about floor stuff. but my little heart stops every time the thing goes off. i've been on call overnight a few times now and it hasn't been bad at all. i'm waiting for the 2am 6 hour case shoe to drop. i'm volunteering for all this call because i heart MONEY. we're going on a few trips in the next few months and for those i want some MONEY. so it's my own fault if i get called in and have a rough night. but please cross your interweb fingers that i won't. i'll keep you posted.

and my butt hurts because when i weighed in monday i was 2 lbs up!!! so i've been busting ass (literally, at the seams) all week working out. did squats and lunges and all kinds of brutal things yesterday and now today all this running up and down the stairs to put out fires with patients hurt a lot. but i will not allow my weight to crawl back up. i will be strong. i will be dilligent. i will be...is that chocolate? can i have a piece? it's low fat if i only have a small corner, right? and it's dark chocolate, so really it's good for my heart and high in anti-oxidants, so technically it's diet food, so i should have a few pieces....

sigh.

(i would seriously cut a bitch for this right now. no joke).

Have Your Butts Checked, People. Seriously.

i helped take a colon tumor out yesterday that was the size of a brain. it was amazing. it had many different surfaces and lymph nodes poking out in all directions and really looked like some sort of extraterrestrial being. and you KNOW it didn't just pop it's ugly little alien head up yesterday. had the patient been having her routine colon cancer screens, maybe it would have been found a long time ago when it wasn't unholy huge and totally adhered to her small intestine and interfering w/ the blood supply to all the rest of her gut. maybe she wouldn't have needed a 4 hour surgery with likely chemo/radiation to follow and still be facing a horrible prognosis.

what IS a routine colon cancer screen you ask? good question. you should be getting colonoscopies/sigmoidoscopies starting at age 50 and then every 5-10 yrs...(unless your MD sees something concerning...then maybe more often. or if you have a first degree relative with colon cancer- then start at least 10 yrs before the age that they were diagnosed). PLUS get annual physicals including rectal exams (yippee!) and fecal occult blood tests. see this site if you have more questions or message me with questions and i'll find you an answer. it's imperative that you follow your MD's guidelines on screening. there are only a select few types of cancers that we can detect early by simple(ish) means. take advantage and don't miss this one. it's pretty common- colon cancer is the 2nd most common type of cancer en los estados unidos. and there's nothing pretty about tumors or having to carry your poo in a bag coming out through your side.

alright. enough lecturing and bumming you out. cancer is bad. we get it.

it's been a busy week. on call some and working late some and did a cool vascular case today and blah blah blah.

weight loss efforts are going great. i'm down 7.5lbs following weight watchers and working out at least 3 times a week. it's fun. i'm fitting into skinny jeans again. we still have (DRAG) another 6 wks left in the weight loss competition, so hopefully i'll keep rolling like i am now.

toodles.