What now?

just finished my surgery interview. i think it went....oh, i don't know. it was scary. first in front of an HR rep for an hour then in front of a panel of 3 PA administrators for another hour. i wonder if they could tell i was terrified, or if i hid it well.

and if i get it...what then? what do i do- which job? AAAAAAHHH!!!

but it seemed likely that it will be one of these two jobs. not just because they are awesome opportunities....but also because i spilled some "green machine" health drink on my suit pants as i was leaving the hospital. and i really hate dry cleaning.

but just as i was about to hang my soiled suit up until years from now when i have occasion again to go through this painful process, i got a call from a residency program interested in interviewing me, and another call from a local private ob/gyn interested in interviewing me. so i'm of course also looking at these options- although might be interviewing pantsless. that would certainly make me stand out from the other applicants, wouldn't it? maybe i'll borrow some tap shoes from someone and some shiny tights and really complete the picture. maybe not.

so the questions is- what do i want to do? what am i willing to do? what will propel my career forward in the direction i want?

shel silverstien says i'll know what's right...and that it's ok if i don't wear pants...or shoes, maybe.

"Tryin' On Clothes"

I tried on a farmer's hat.
Didn't fit...
A little too small--just a bit.
Too floppy.
Couldn't get used to it.
Took it off.
Tried on the dancer's shoes,
A little too loose.
Not the kind you could use
For walkin'.
Didn't feel right in 'em.
Kicked 'em off.
I tried on the summer sun.
Felt good.
Nice and warm--knew it would.
Tried the grass beneath bare feet
Felt neat.
Finally, finally felt well dressed,
Nature's clothes fit me best.

-Shel Silverstien